Awesome! The language and grammar are awesome! Your wordings make the delivery even more effective... nice choice of vocab... Looking forward to reading the story!
'he performed better in the battle last year' - I'm not sure that is really the case. In the previous year, Harry battle Voldemort to a standstill (albeit due to the Priori Incantatem effect). Last year would have been a slaughter if Dumbedore hadn't arrive to save the day. In both cases Harry needed luck and outside help to survive.
I think you make a very good assessment of Molly -- she is quite amazing. Now that was a rather awful dream.
So Voldie has a new wand. Does he really think it will be successful?
Oooh...perfect. A core of chimera, dark twisted and unnatural, like Voldemort's soul. Heehee. Very creepy. I absolutely LOVED the Voldemort's-point-of-view thing. And Ron was absolutely ADORABLE in this chappie. So priceless. Ginny was suitably mischievous, just like I like her...and the Dursleys were at their terrible best. Huzzah! Onward!
I'm intrigued! Why will this wand allow Voldemort to kill Harry, and his regular one won't? Clearly I'll have to keep reading to find out! *grin*
Great story so far! I particularly think you've written post-OotP Harry very well...all of his angst and moodiness comes across well, but he seems to be a little more adept at figuring out his emotions than he did in that book.
Your Ron is quite amusing -- I like that he is incredulous at the thought that he could possibly have a crush on Hermione, and that he loves her hair, bushy as it is! He likes her for who she is.
This was a great chapter; I
printed this out and took it in the bathtub with me, read most of it in
there :) Kitty cat tried to join in, but he can't quite read English.
I've often been curious as to how
Harry will make it to the Burrow in HBP, I believe this will be
something close to what you did with the plot. I only hope that Vernon
doesn't make his life as miserable in canon. Yeah right.
I loved the detail with the dream
sequence, you have a good imagination :) Umbridge was pleasant, wasn't
she? Perhaps her and Voldemort could get Lost.
:) How adorable is Ron when he's
so confused over his feelings for Hermione! Ron's a sharp shooter, but
he couldn't make this easier on himself to save his life. Ah well,
that's part of all the charm. Of course, I enjoyed Ginny's teasing,
it's nice to see a comfortable Gin around Harry.
Say.. I think you might've written that breakfast bit just for me. Oatmeal? Egg whites? Turkey sausage? Reduced fat cheese? Mmmm
I've always thought that Mr.
Weasley's fascination with Muggle objects to be amusing. Him clicking
the pen over and over again.. classic. I did that just today :)
Oh, the ending is creepy. Nice story so far. I liked the Ginny/Ron dialogue. Ginny does seem a bit casual with Harry though. Other than that, I like where it's headed. Of course, leave it to me to start the story after it's ended.
Sib Sunday 17th October 2004 21:26
1: Solitary Thoughts (Author Response)
Ginny seemed to be getting more comfortable with Harry at the end of OotP, so I don't think it was too bad. But don't worry; some cracks will show in her control on occasion, heh.
Nothing wrong with starting after it's ended, in fact, you don't have to wait for new chapters. Of course, reviews are still appreciated even when it's completed.
wow. i'm addicted already. i'm really happy to read the care you put into Harry's worries, and the interactions between the characters. you really are wonderful at keeping true to the characters (i couldn't help but grin at Ginny's giggles, and Arthur's fascination with the ballpoint pen).
and i'm only on chapter 1! i'll probably reading this all through the night!
You certainly covered a great deal of ground with this chapter! I feel you expressed Harry’s emotions very realistically throughout. His anger at fate and the situation he finds himself, his grief for his losses, the guilt he always seems determined to shoulder, fear of the future and eventually the comfort he gets from the Weasleys. I also like the gallows humor of Harry writing a fake note summing up the prophesy. Nice foreshadowing having Harry think of Ginny’s experiences, reminding us of the greater comfort level between the two.
I like the contrast from Harry’s perspective to Ginny’s. Her life certainly seems more content, and it’s nice to see her trying to stifle those pesky crush feelings. The idea of these two as friends first appeals to me.
Poor Ron. At least he’s finally aware that something is changing between he and Hermione. I hope they work it out before too long, moody Ron could drive Ginny crazy if Harry decides to brood all day as well. Grin.
What an awful nightmare. Lets’ hope that there aren’t too many of those in our future. Knowing Harry, I’m not too confident however. I like that each reminder of his fears sends him to learn more and more. This will help once he gains the power Dumbledore predicts.
I love the scene with Arthur. He was fully prepared to deal with the Dursleys, but you can just picture him relax once he knows that they’re gone. And the pen clicking! I wonder how long before this drives everyone crazy. Grin. It’s too bad Ginny couldn’t have gone with, but your scenerio was more realistic. I wish he would have given her the same hug he gave Ron and Mrs. Weasley.
Ginny and Harry discussing Ron was classic. Leave it to a little sister to tell all your secrets. I like that Gin mentions Harry’s habit for evil fighter as a joke. And that it didn’t send Harry into a brood.
I can’t wait for the birthday party- how many people can the burrow fit?
Voldemort’s creation of a dueling wand to beat Harry- when I noticed the inscription, I can’t help but wonder if he plans on adding in a death date to the wand. Very chilling.
All in all, well written, strong dialogue and an interesting direction to your story. I look forward to reading more.
Best Regards,
Pix’ellie
ellie
Sib Tuesday 7th September 2004 20:43
1: Solitary Thoughts (Author Response)
Wow! You keep leaving reviews like this, I might have to name a character after you. Thank you very much for such a detailed review.
That's funny; I hadn't thought about the fact that Harry had hugged Ron and Mrs. Weasley, but not Ginny. It just sort of worked out that way, but it does make sense, heh.
I love Ron's and Ginny's conversations with Harry and each other.
Ron grinned at him. "Er, yeah. Harry, you're my best mate, but you're going to have to learn some self-control. I know I'm spectacularly handsome and all, but people will talk."
The language and grammar are awesome! Your wordings make the delivery even more effective... nice choice of vocab... Looking forward to reading the story! .gif)
ron is a git u knows he likes Hermione but is to shy never imagined that
battle Voldemort 
to a standstill (albeit due to the Priori Incantatem effect). Last year would have been a slaughter if Dumbedore 
hadn't arrive to save the day. In both cases Harry needed luck and outside help to survive.
Thank you very much for such a detailed review.