Good start. I could do with less anthrpormorphizing of the birds (at least you did not have them outright talking in posh accents). But otherwise I like the start.
Gridley Monday 17th July 2006 05:26
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I think we've seen in cannon that Hedwig is a bit more than your typical owl, and my take on phoenixes... but that would be telling.
Wands and swords? I'm fond of it on several levels - for one thing, one of my fencing instructors taught about the way Hogwarts classes seem to run - show us a cool move, and then spend hours with us trying to do it right even once.
Excellent - not only the story, but the fact that you continue to write
them. Amazing how you can come back and give us updated
versions! Congrats on the new home and job - good luck, and I
truly look forward to continuing stories as this one has already stolen
my attention!
Gridley Tuesday 4th October 2005 05:18
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
Thanks - this all has been a big step up for me, but its been rather busy.
ahhh!! i'm tingling with anticipation after what is clearly a
wonderful start to an amazing story. i'm a big fan of your other
novel-length fics (having discovered them belatedly), so i was very
excited to see you've started a post-HBP fic. i can already see
that i will like this one just as much as i enjoyed your other
stories! yay!
Gridley Wednesday 28th September 2005 06:07
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
Glad you enjoyed the rest, and thanks for reviewing.
I liked it, especially Remus as a tutor. It does seem like Harry's
going to need some help beyond R&H's, and this starts to solve that
problem. Oh, and I loved the dream... indigestion, indeed! But
shouldn't there be only five snitches left?
Gridley Wednesday 28th September 2005 06:06
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
If the dream were entirely present tense, yes, but it isn't. It is a mixture of what was, is, and 'has not yet come to pass.'
Must be nice to have a wizard for your swordsmith. :-)
I'm enjoying this fic a great deal. Fawkes's appearance was a very pleasant surprise! (Though I do have my doubts about the whether the sword mightn't be a horcrux after all...)
I look forward to the rest of it!
Gridley Wednesday 28th September 2005 06:05
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
You know, I never considered that the sword might be a horcrux? Hmm... well, it sat in Dumbledore's office for several years, so he probably would have noticed. Of course he... AAARRRGH! THE BUNNIES!
Well, in this story it is not a horcrux. But that really is a novel... BUNNIES!
Good chapter, perhaps some idea as to what exactly Harry is going to do between "now" and actively starting to search for the Horocruxes?
Excellent story anyway, you're not going to turn Hedwig into a phoenix are you?
Update soon!
Gridley Wednesday 28th September 2005 06:02
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
Well, I figured Harry won't go searching for the Horcruxes until he's of age (allowing him to do magic, apparate, etc. without worrying about the Ministry - not that that would be a BIG worry, but still...).
No, Hedwig will remain an owl. It may be typecasting, but I like her that way.
The rapier is nice, but I'm still one for the simple elegance of the MP5.
The beginnings of the story look good. I like the directiona and
tone thus far. I'm interested to see how the foreshadowing of the
dream plays out. Write with skill, write with speed, and update
often. I'm looking forward to reading your newest story.
-millercommamatt
Gridley Wednesday 28th September 2005 06:01
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I already did my MP5 story - three of them, in fact. :-)
heh. i loved the dream sequence and harry's random little comments about the sword. it is still as wonderful as last chapter:}
Gridley Friday 23rd September 2005 06:09
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I'm surprised by how many people like the dream sequence, since it started life as filler, needed to be heavily controlled to keep it from getting as dark as it wanted to be, and almost got cut.
Maybe I need to post that deleted scene from Price of Freedom after all...
Brilliant! I'm another who thinks Fawkes needs to look to Harry now that Dumbledore's gone. Love where this is heading so far!!!
One glitch: "Hedwig’s cage was in his trunk. He grasped the cage in one hand and gently gripped one of Fawkes’ legs in the other." uh, I'm sure you see exactly the problem, now that I've pointed it out to you...
Gridley Friday 23rd September 2005 06:07
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
On the glitch - you missed the word "except" earlier in the sentance. That being said, I did a last-minute revision changing what was in the trunk and what wasn't, so that sentance didn't get much polishing.
Since Fawkes has left Hogwarts, Harry does seem a logical choice to me, too. I don't see him sitting on a beach getting a tan while the rest of the war is fought out.
Hmmm... looks as if Fawkes has learned to not be especially subtle when trying to communicate with Harry. :-}
The thought of how the Dursleys might behave if Harry were wandering in
their house while wielding that sword got a snort from this reader....
The interchange between Fawkes & Hedwig is fascinating. :-)
I see that Harry has acquired a very keen sense of swordsmanship.... :-}
Slightly more seriously, judging by your terminal note (for the
chapter), I gather that swordsmanship is likely to play a highly
non-trivial role in the story.
Gridley Friday 23rd September 2005 06:04
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I'm a student of the sword, and "write what you know" is a common bit of advice.
Fawkes might try being subtle if: a. he could speak, or b. he wasn't dealing with Harry.
The Fawkes/Hedwig interaction is one of the earliest bits of this story I envisioned. A plot bunny about a Fawkes/Hedwig ship is currently chasing me, but I'm well ahead.
I enjoyed this chapter, and I was so glad to see Fawkes again. I do have hopes that he'll eventually join Harry's quest. I loved the note to Ron about missing Ginny. I also liked how the Dursleys reamined in character and didn't become suddenly soppy. I'm eager for more.
Gridley Friday 23rd September 2005 06:00
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I'm a fan of gray characters, but I tend to write them as good guys, not bad guys. If bad guys are bad, they're easier to kill off in appropriate ways.
I'm very much enjoying this! I'm so glad you're sticking to the
idea of Harry not returning to Hogwarts. I've enjoyed all your
stories and will be closely watching this. Your creative
solutions tend to feel so logical and obvious; as if there's no other way for canon to go! Can't wait to see what you have in store for us here.
Gridley Friday 23rd September 2005 05:58
1: Privet Drive (Author Response)
I plot based on a very wise piece of advice: "Ask 'what if' and then 'what next?'" Start from a few fairly logical premises and you tend to get a logical story (which, since this is fantasy, is a long way from it being a true story, but hey...).
Can't wait to see what you have in store for us here.
