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Reviews For Curse Breakers: The Maya by Jonathan-Avery

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Showing 1 to 12 of 12
MrRobertsIII
Monday 24th March 2008 09:56


3rd year
Num. of Reviews: 117

1: The Egyptian Situation
Great fic. I'm starting to reread it and its just as good the second time.
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Narumi
Tuesday 6th November 2007 10:22


Hogwarts alumni
Num. of Reviews: 368

1: The Egyptian Situation
Very interesting! I've seen this pop up on the updates list for quite a while, and finally decided to give it a try over my lunch break. I'm definitely intrigued! I like that you didn't dwell on why Ginny would leave England and her family, what happened with Voldemort, or even her relationship with Harry. It's hard for most authors to pull that off. But I'll have you know I expect some details in the next few chapters!
Jonathan-Avery
Friday 9th November 2007 07:38
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
The first chapter is always a tricky one because I have to capture the essence of the story in a single section. The story is really about Ginny and although Harry impacts that, you needed to see who Ginny was independent of everything that was her past. Sure, I couldn't keep everything out, but I was going for a more blase attitude toward her past. However that is not because it isn't important but rather she has had 7 years to come to grips with it.

The next several chapters are much more detail oriented and set up the rest of the book.

Thanks a lot,

-Jonathan
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GhostWriter
Thursday 31st May 2007 03:51


2nd year
Num. of Reviews: 66

1: The Egyptian Situation
An excellent start! I really enjoyed all of the detail you created for the Mayan wizarding world. Your description of the duel in the burial chamber was harrowing! You also really have a knack for creating a truly loathesome character, i.e., Satterfield. I really hope we're going to see him get his comeuppance in future chapters. I look forward to reading more.
Jonathan-Avery
Saturday 2nd June 2007 07:06
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
I like action sequences that are gritty and and have a a sputtering pace of quick movements followed by careful calculation and decision. Most fighting ends u being that way. I've rarely seen a fight that doesn't have those lulls. And Satterfield is necessary. You need a good bad guy at times. He'll show up again.
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BasketKiwi
Wednesday 30th May 2007 20:36


5th year
Num. of Reviews: 233

1: The Egyptian Situation
Ooh, this is fascinating! I don't think I've really ever read another fanfiction like this, and I'm very excited to read the rest of it! The style is informative without being cold or boring (anything but, obviously!) and the story is really interesting. And the Mayan culture and mythology are a bonus!
Jonathan-Avery
Saturday 2nd June 2007 07:03
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
Thanks. It is a bit difficult to balance the action with the detail information of the mythology and curse breaking. Hopefully I can keep it up.
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hedwig5221
Sunday 20th May 2007 20:54


2nd year
Num. of Reviews: 60

1: The Egyptian Situation
I was looking for something new to read tonight and ran across this story. So far, I love it! Ginny is a strong character and your Ginny is believable as a young Curator and Curse Breaker. I haven't been to SIYE so I missed this story there and will just follow it here...I'm on to the next chapter!

Jonathan-Avery
Monday 21st May 2007 16:41
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
I'm glad I caught your eye. I think I've mentioned to other people, that I love strong heroines. I think it is because when i moved from the standard adolescent and children's books when I was ten, the first book I read was Clan of the Cave Bear, and Ayla really defined for me how personal the heroic journey can be. It soon followed afterward with books like Spellfire, Dune, and Anne Rice's books as I got older, and the strong female personas in those books helped define my writing over the years to the point where I struggle at times with my male characters.

As for following the story, I would recommend following it here as well, since this version is the more polished, and i will be quickly caught up on this site. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
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girl from ipanema
Monday 7th May 2007 15:11


2nd year
Num. of Reviews: 60

1: The Egyptian Situation
Welcome to Phoenix Song. I have been following your story at the other site and it is a RELIEF to have you here. From a user's point of view this is so much easier. Also, the overall quality of the stories is so much better. Better plot, better characters, better grammar. Welcome to the elite.
Jonathan-Avery
Wednesday 9th May 2007 18:16
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
Ah, thanks. But you'll have to tell that to Sovran as he is the one who convinced me to post here. Although, as an author, I definitely like PS. HTML coding before posting is a horrible pain. To be able to work directly with my beta to get the story validated, and the help from the Sherry and the rest of the staff was great. Luckily, I should be caught up to SIYE on PS in several weeks.

thanks,

Jonathan
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critmo
Monday 7th May 2007 06:13


Hogwarts alumni
Num. of Reviews: 685

1: The Egyptian Situation
Well, there are stories out there, starting with less momentum than this one.

The references to Harry make me afraid that something went fundamentally wrong there. Is he dead or gone?

Finally, I'm surprised that Satterfield et al. get off so lightly. An attempted murder of a superior should have other consequences.
Jonathan-Avery
Wednesday 9th May 2007 18:13
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
I like having momentum, it helps to get through the development chapters that follow.

As to Harry, well, he's not dead, but there is a lot that has been left unfinished. You'll find out more next chapter.

Ah, the Satterfield issue. Several people have commented on this to me. It doesn't get explained until later, mainly because it has to do with the relationship of curse breakers and Gringotts and stopping the action to have a history lesson does not work with the pacing I have and Ginny is not thinking about it at that point. However, it will be explained.
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sillysun
Monday 7th May 2007 05:43


1st year
Num. of Reviews: 14

1: The Egyptian Situation
What an intriguing beginning! I really like seeing Ginny so confident and self-sufficient, and it was also nice to get a glimpse of who she is without knowing where she stands with Harry. I'll be eagerly looking forward to the next update; I enjoy your writing style a lot.
Jonathan-Avery
Wednesday 9th May 2007 17:54
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
Thanks. I am a big fan of strong heroines, and I believe Ginny has a great deal of potential to be strong and independent. More importantly, wars change people in deeply fundemental ways, and I wanted to reflect that with Ginny.

Thanks for reading and reviewing.
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kmagarden
Sunday 6th May 2007 21:24


1st year
Num. of Reviews: 8

1: The Egyptian Situation
OH Dang. LOL I am following this story at SIYE which is a little ahead of this. When I checked here tonight and saw your story, I was hoping for an update. I continue to look forward to your next chapter. You are a great writer and this is shaping up to be an intersting story!
Jonathan-Avery
Wednesday 9th May 2007 17:43
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
Well, the update is on SIYE now. As to being a great writer, well thanks for the praise, but I just try and do my best. I hope I can keep up with your expectations.
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Kamalia
Sunday 6th May 2007 21:17


3rd year
Num. of Reviews: 142

1: The Egyptian Situation
Wow! This is brilliant! An excellent start that has kept me up past my bedtime - commendable effort. I hope this one goes on for a long time because it's starting out with a bang. Kudos!
Jonathan-Avery
Tuesday 8th May 2007 04:34
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
I'm not sure whether to apologize for keeping you up past your bedtime or to be glad you enjoyed it that much. Maybe a dose of both would be what the doctor ordered. As to how long it is going to go on, I guess the easiest answer is until it is finished. I originally outlined 13 chapters and an epilogue. However, the outline has grown a bit and I'm at 21 chapters with an epilogue.

I will endeavor my best to keep the story hopping along, but as a gentle warning, I wouldn't expect there to always be action. Curse breaking is as much about research as flashy spellwork.

thanks for reading and for the review.
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Grandma Kate
Sunday 6th May 2007 20:57


Hogwarts alumni
Num. of Reviews: 964

1: The Egyptian Situation
What an excellent first chapter! I look forward to learning more about your Ginny.
Jonathan-Avery
Tuesday 8th May 2007 04:24
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
Ginny is a fascinating character in canon and I've always been surprised at how little Rowling really uses her when she has been set up so well as a counterpoint to Harry. she has all th qualities that make a strong heroine and many of the problems that become the obstacle she needs to overcome. CB is really about Ginny growth into someone she can respect.
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girlyswot
Sunday 6th May 2007 18:57


1st year
Num. of Reviews: 27

1: The Egyptian Situation
I'm so glad you're posting this here. I don't really hang out at SIYE much but I came across the first chapter or two of this and every so often pop back to check if you've updated. Now it'll be much easier for me to follow and also to review.

I really like this opening chapter. You've established your own setting, with strong characterisations and interesting background. And there's plenty of promise of what's to come later (I hope!) I like the way you show Ginny as the independent, very-competent woman who's more than a match for the greedy, self-serving men around her. I'm looking forward to seeing more of her interactions with Harry too.

Your chapters are so long I can quite see why it takes you a while to update, but I hope you're still making progress with the writing. This is one worth waiting for!
Jonathan-Avery
Sunday 6th May 2007 19:56
1: The Egyptian Situation (Author Response)
You'll have to thank Sovran for convincing me to post here and Sherry who went out of her way to get me through the posting process.

You know, this chapter is so far my favourite as well, and surprisingly, it was never a part of the original draft. The story originally opened in the second chapter, but it never really caught me as a good opening. So I puttered with it and puttered with it, put it aside, and went back to it. Then, one day, I was messing around with my outlines and watching The Temple of Doom, and it just hit me. I needed to set the scene and catch the interest of the reader! Suddenly, Ginny was in this tomb and the rest of the plot clicked into place.

It is not really the length of the chapter that slows me down but the research that I am doing. I started this series with no knowledge of the Maya beyond standard misconceptions. More importantly, since I have set the story in a real place, I have to take the time to make sure I am accurate in my descriptions of weather, indigenous people, vegetation, and even the building styles of the Maya and their history. None of this research is in my outlines, those just tell me what is going to happen. All the details take time to research and then write. Also, I have a very busy RL, so that detracts from writing time as well.

But the story is always at the forefront of my mind, and I am moving forward. Chapter 5 is finished and 6 is about 20% done. I'll be doing updates on PS every week until I catch up with SIYE.

Anyway, thanks for reading and being my first review on Phoenix Song.
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