Awesome story just as before, but now I'm comenting as I go along. One thing I really like is how you aproach Molly Weasley. You give her a more human side then just bubbly towards Harry. And she acts like a mother would if their child was in this situation. Harry is joined to Ginny and they are young. She is also the youngest and a girl. I can immagine how it must be for a parent to let go to let the child learn to fall and bounce back from hurt, but they are still little to the parent. Thank you for the view from the other side.
Bucky!
This is a good story. I think I need to go back to your story list and see what I have missed. Is there a previous story before this one? I'll go look.
If there is another story I'll start reviewing this one when I catch up. p
This is a good story. I think I need to go back to your story list and see what I have missed. Is there a previous story before this one? I'll go look.
If there is another story I'll start reviewing this one when I catch up. p
Sovran Monday 10th December 2007 09:20
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
Yup, this is Part Two. Hopefully you've found Part One by now. Thanks for reading!
Let's see, the scene you paint with the rising of the sun was really cool. It really captured that time of day really well. I also really liked the contrasting picture of Uncle Vernon and Arthur Weasley waiting for breakfast to be served. Completely amazing that something could be exactly the same, and so different at the same time.
You have an interesting concept on charging the wards at Harry's aunt and uncles' home. I've never really seen it like this, and it works really well. somehow, I think JKR must have had something very similar in mind when she came up with them.
I can see how Harry rescuing Ginny from cooking would be tough for Molly. I'm not sure if your Harry meant to do this, but he definately implies that he and Ginny are going to be together till the end of their days, and that he will cook for her. Basically, saying that someday they will be married. Essentially, this is exactly what Molly is afraid of. They're both to young for this, but her they are. In many ways, I think it sets Molly back in growing to accept Harry and Ginny.
All in all, great job once again.
Sovran Wednesday 1st August 2007 09:41
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
I'm not sure how JKR intended the wards to work, but I've tried to come up with something that fits canon and makes sense. I'm glad you like it.
Wow, what a great start to the second installment in your story! I had high expectations and you met them brilliantly. Well done! What I enjoyed most in this chapter was the humanity, not just of Harry and the memories he talks about but also of Ginny and Mr. Weasley. You write the elder Weasley very well and I like the insight you've given him. I wonder what Dumbledore said to the Dursleys? Whatever it was, they sure seemed to have listened. Being left alone is much better than fighting with Vernon and Petunia.
I'm really looking forward to the upcoming chapters. I know I've said this many times before, but posting such long chapters every other week is a really amazing feat. You should almost be able to feel my envy I hope we get to learn more about the mysterious bond this time around. Oh, and "shifting", what a great name. I laughed when Harry and Ginny were discussing it because it gave me a glimpse into your thoughts while coming up with the name!
Sovran Wednesday 13th June 2007 07:14
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
I hope that your glimpse into my thoughts didn't leave you traumatized.
To me, Molly is much more developed in canon than Arthur is. That meant that I got to think about his characterization in relation to hers, since we know that they're happily married. This Arthur is the result of that thought process, and I like him a lot.
I hope I can keep up with the 2-week pace, but it may lag here and there. Some parts of this story are really complicated. To me, anyway.
Good to see you back. I still think Molly is being contradictory, venting her worry over her children by punishing them. I look forward to seeing how you flip this particular bit. Had you thought of having them clip the grass in different lengths that then spell out words or pictrures when evening sun lights the grass. A bit like the stripes on a mown lawn?
Sovran Wednesday 13th June 2007 07:10
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
I'm not sure they'd think of that, though it would definitely be entertaining. Thanks!
I enjoyed the first part and this part seems to be off to a good start. I am following a number of stories and this is one of my favorites. You must put a lot of work into it and I am grateful for your efforts. Thanks again. W.
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:15
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
It is a lot of work, but I certainly enjoy writing it, so I'm glad you enjoy reading it. Thanks!
I was so happy when I saw the next story up. I'm glad that the Dursley's are sorta getting what's coming to them. Poot Harry though. Having to relive that. It's hard to talk about even years after the fact. I'm really curious as to how the diary is going to come into play. Half the reason in cannon that Ginny got sucked in as far as she did was because she was in huge crush mode over Harry. That's not the case anymore. So I can't wait to read your take on it.
Anyway, great chapter, I can't wait for the next.
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:13
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
I'm really looking forward to the main CoS plot, but we've a bit of summer to deal with, first. Thanks for reading!
I guess that was a good change for Harry. But Dursleys always seem to get off easy. I guess it can't be helped ; otherwise one might just become like them. I like Harry in the kitchen (Weasley's that is ).
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:11
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
Yeah, stupid Dursleys. No one can or will punish them the way they deserve. Well, not yet, anyway.
I can't imagine a worse punishment. Between cutting the grass with sissors and afternoons at the Dursleys, it doesn't look like a good summer. Trust Molly to make them stick to it. I hope something happens soon to warm Molly up to Harry. I don't really care for your Molly at all right now and that just seems... wrong. Nice work! Glad to see the new story started.
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:10
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
Thanks very much! I don't much care for my Molly either, and it is continuously hard to think of her the way I have to in order to write her. But of course, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, right?
A very good start to the sequal. I'd hate to have to cut all that grass with just sissors. :0) I like the new arrangment with the Dursleys. It kinda seens like Harry is spending less time there. And the Dursleys aren't even bothering him so...yeah. Worderful chapter.
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:07
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
It's a big improvement for Harry, I think, even though he still has to do chores. Thanks for reading!
Woohoo! First here.
Shift. I am wondering about my initial idea that they are shifting reality about them somehow/maybe/perhaps. With Harry at the Burrow, spending leisure time with Ginny, I look forward to them exploring this issue more. I don't know if your plot inclues this, but MoO!Ginny is very curious and Harry is very driven, so...
Sovran Thursday 24th May 2007 14:05
1: First Breaks (Author Response)
See how far behind I am on responding to reviews? Bad author, bad!
What do you suppose Einstein would say about your question? And I daresay that h/g will have plenty to keep them occupied.
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