I'm guessing that you are a male because of your user name and I just wanted to say that you should have a female BETA so the proposal scene doesn't seem corny or anything. (I have read the entire story. Not just this chapter)
vegasdude555 Saturday 17th November 2007 18:51
Chapter 1 (Author Response)
I am male and so is my BETA, i'm sorry that you think it's corny but you have to realize Harry is a male, and if you are stereotyping that males come up with "corny" proposals; then according to your logic harry's would be corny as well. I know that you are just giving your opinion which i appreciate but please don't bring my BETA into it, he does a wonderful job and works extremely hard.
I have a small quibble about the funeral and most post-DH fics set right after the battle so I'm not criticizing your story in particular, but besides Fred, Remus, Tonks and Colin, fifty others died defending Hogwarts. Yet I have seen few post-DH fics which allude to those others. Who were they? Cho? Katie Bell? Anthony Goldstein? Justin Finch-Fletchley? Winky? Did Lavender survive her injuries? Regardless, their sacrifice is usually overlooked in fanfics.
vegasdude555 Saturday 3rd November 2007 14:17
Chapter 1 (Author Response)
well you have to realize that most of the ppl who died were students which means that their funerals would be very personal to their family's and friends and would have happened the same day as fred, remus, and tonks funeral. Yes it was sad they died but you have to be realistic Harry didn't know everyone who died (not saying he didn't care that they died or that he didn't go to some of their funerals or that the wizarding world didn't appreciate what they did) but those funerals really have nothing to do with this story but the funeral of Remus, Fred, and Tonks on the other hand would have been the most difficult for Harry because those were the ppl he knew the best that died, not to mention how it effected his loved ones. Plus it's always good to leave some questions unanswered for the reader so they can decide for themselves.
What a lovely start to the story. I appreciate that you took the time to get the events in a logical order. You wouldn't believe some of the timelines I've come across in post DH stories that don't seem to take cannon into account at all. I also loved Mr. Weasley with the "Magic 8-ball." That was brilliant.
Congrats on a great beginning! The story sets the stage nicely for the upcoming . . . adventures. love, problems? The way you have written tells me that you have something great in store for us. Hurry, I want to see how it all turns out!
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