Do you mind if I nag for a bit? Thanks.
Yet there are several smaller lakes geographically scattered nearby, the nearest lake is called Secuutus Lake and yet it is this very lake the Hogsmeade villagers avoid. This is called a comma splice. It means that the clauses in the sentence are separated only by a comma, and nothing else. It's considered bad taste, as far as I know. You can rectify it like this:
Yet there are several smaller lakes geographically scattered nearby, and although the nearest lake is called Secuutus Lake, it is this very lake the Hogsmeade villagers avoid.
Or,
Yet there are several smaller lakes geographically scattered nearby; the nearest lake is called Secuutus Lake...
Or else,
Yet there are several smaller lakes geographically scattered nearby. The nearest lake is called Secuutus Lake, and yet it is this very lake the Hogsmeade villagers avoid.
More on the comma splice can be found here: http://webster.commnet.edu/grammar/runons.htm three level stone and wood cottage - I'm not sure, but I think there should be a hyphen here: "three-level stone and wood cottage".
upper class Italians - same here: "upper-class Italians".
Sorry for nagging
As to the prologue itself, it was good, if a bit small. I think I'll read the next existing chapters first thing in the morning, after I've slept for a bit.
Best regards,
- LoonyPhoenix | 