huskers
Monday 24th December 2007 18:35 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Yesh,
An entire chapter to set up the real fight. I love it. The back story on the Grangersis wonderful. Whatever did happen to Meg. Some people are so stupid. Freedom must be paid for with the blood of the enemy. And I'm sure her uncle, or cousin, or whoever it was was killing people too. I know, it is make believe. Separate from the story dear reader. Of course, that is the goal of the author, isn't it. To drage us in, make us love and hate certain characters. You are doing a great job of it. Thanks for a wonderful story. |
daniel_r_crazy22
Friday 22nd December 2006 00:02 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| Both groups of Death Eaters stoped saying the curse because the Order showed up right. And I don't like Meg. |
GryffindorDragon
Tuesday 12th September 2006 15:35 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
So its not Meg but Syl . "Those aren't knives. This is a knife" -- Let me guess, you've been watching Crocodile Dundee . Very interesting chapter . . . good buildup.
|
dalf
Saturday 26th August 2006 03:38 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
The perspective this is written in is intresting. The standard for fiction now days seems to be the third person limited omnicient. This which I think is the unlimited version at times is harder to write, but makes for a diffrence in mood and feel that I like. There have been a few moments wher eI have lost track of where the action is happeneind and who is who, but I think this is caused by the rapid changes form diffrent flashbacks memories and diffrent peoples thoughts. All in all I think you are doing it well, but be carful, and try to avoid those sections where you are trying to concel the identy of the speaker/thinker if you are going to be switching a lot.
Good work,
Dalf |
Rocky235
Friday 14th October 2005 15:34 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| I'm sorry that I can't help you improve your craft, but I'm enjoying your story. |
MrRobertsIII
Saturday 19th February 2005 21:08 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
, "If you follow me for one more step I will pull out my mace and spray you." -Hey! My recruiter told me that every girl loves a soldier.
kitchen with shelved items arranged by category and further arranged by height.
-Even if he wasn't SAS, I wouldn't mess with him.
, I have misled you and you have every right to be furious with me.
-That was a very sweet, soldierly, confession.
"They rang the door bell,"
-"Death-o-gram". I really liked the knife fight in the alley and everything military in this fic. All other fics have the Grangers as being somewhat wimpy. Nice change to see some butt-kicking Muggles. |
Gridley
Tuesday 15th February 2005 04:44 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Scratch two DE's, I think. :-)
Nice cliffies, though. |
sonicdale
Monday 14th February 2005 07:00 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
OOOOO. Nice.
I'm glad you didn't make the Granger parents Mary Janes. The fact that he got hurt shows that he's not some invincible superman. I hope you keep the action flowing as nice as this chapter.
I'm curious to the 'rearangements'. I hope you xpand on that.
Good job. |
Iris
Sunday 13th February 2005 08:24 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
wonderful story...can't wait to see what the Death Eaters have coming
~Iris |
unople
Saturday 12th February 2005 19:36 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Wow. I love this story. Is this going to be a fill sixth-year fic?
|
Dice
Saturday 12th February 2005 13:45 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Shame on the Death Eaters. They brought wands to a gunand knife fight. Silly boys, when wil they learn. I guess no one told them the first rule of a Gun fight,
1. Bring a gun.
Hermione is about to be in for the second shock of her life (the first being her current situation).
Love the story so far. No real nits to pick. Well, maybe
one. If that metallic sound at the end is what i think it is, is
that legal in the UK?
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:42 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
Ne-oX
Saturday 12th February 2005 05:48 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
What a great story
I'm really looking forward to future chapters.
Simon
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:42 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
Aberforth's Avatar
Saturday 12th February 2005 03:09 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| This was very, very nice. I loved the Death Eaters ringing the doorbell. What a wonderful little touch. Your back story for the Grangers is lovely, and a very nice set-up for the rest of your story. It thoroughly engages my interest, at least. I'm very much looking forward to more. |
Paula
Saturday 12th February 2005 02:34 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Wow!
That was amazing. I can't wait to read more of this goodness.
I loved the Grangers' story.
Please, udpate soon.
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:43 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
Robert Owen
Saturday 12th February 2005 01:56 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| Shame on the Death Eaters. They brought wands to a gunand knife fight. Silly boys, when wil they learn. |
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:43 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
dave gerecke
Saturday 12th February 2005 01:41 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| Go, Go!
Keep going!
I like this story!
dave |
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:44 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
Kelleypen
Friday 11th February 2005 23:26 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| I am really loving this whole tough Granger thing. And the allusion to Crocodile Dundee was well placed. Wonderful fic. |
anonymous5
Friday 11th February 2005 23:00 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
congrats. You just wrote the ABSOLUTE WORST CLIFFHANGER I have ever read.
update soon, update often! Excellent story so far, with the most unique premise I've seen in a really long time!
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:44 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
huffboy36
Friday 11th February 2005 22:12 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| Ooooh, brilliant work. Suspenseful, romantic, edgy ... I'm on pins and needles here. Don't stop.
|
B. Nonymous
Friday 11th February 2005 21:25 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
Another good one!
One small nit... was mace avialable in 1977? I thought of mace as a 1980s invention. |
| Saturday 12th February 2005 05:08 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
| You are correct. After a little research (after posting the story) I found that Mace Security Products dates back to the early '80s. Mr. Ollivander and I find that when you reach our age, some of the 'newer' memories fade. Now, ask us about the invention of the machine gun.... |
amulder
Friday 11th February 2005 20:18 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
the tension is building. Wow. I want to be on Steph's side.
thanks
...art
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:46 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Dear Art - - Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
You have been reading this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts. It will not continue 'over there.'
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
seamusisevil
Friday 11th February 2005 17:25 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
| brillant i cant wait for the rest of this story |
Sauron
Friday 11th February 2005 17:22 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” |
First! :)
Guess I was wrong about Meg. Oh well. Live and learn, I suppose.
This is an excellent continuation of your story, though now that we're
starting to see some present-time action, I find myself getting
impatient to see more of it. However, pay no attention to that. You just keep on like you're doing.
I do love the DEs ringing the front doorbell. I've never seen that
before; I always figured a doorbell was just too Muggle for them to
bother. But, there's always the first rule of an ambush to
consider...open with your biggest bang. If ringing the doorbell ensures
a victim is within range, all the better. A very nice touch.
|
| Sunday 4th December 2005 07:48 | “Great Scott, Potter, This is War!” (Author Response) |
Thank you for your review from so very long ago.
"The Granger Defense" here on PhoenixSong has been renamed "Great Scott, Potter, This is War!" and is now being continued through Harry's sixth year on this site. The next chapter after the Grangers defeated the Death Eaters has now been posted.
If you have read this elsewhere, the chapters starting with this one are being edited and rewritten in some parts.
I would be grateful to you if you consider continuing reading and reviewing.
Thanks again, and Cheers! |
