Superb! Such a finely crafted chapter - it's very tight, no wobbly bits! (Oh dear, that sounds rather awful, doesn't it? I mean every word is perfectly placed and that makes getting engrossed in the story very, very easy!) I loved everything - the fluffy beginning, the very realistic breakfast scene with perfect renditions of everyone (esp. loved Hermione! and Tonks! oh, and Remus - well, ok, loved them all!!), the suspenseful mystery...

a dollop of sheer perversion - *shivers* Also, did you mean "the Lestrange's toyboy" or "the Lestranges' toyboy" - the second would be even more perverted, I think...

Certain circumstances had forced an early retirement - LOL! dare I ask?

I have one tiny little quibble: I think Seamus' name is Finnigan, not Finnegan. (I'm a bit canon-retentive, as you can see!)

BTW, I too admire those who can produce the long stuff - it's just not in me, but you have the beginnings of a suspenseful (and I hope fluffy?) story and I'm sure you'll pull it off. Just don't rush yourself, because I really enjoy reading such well-written stuff. Ok, better read the next chapter in case it's rubbish and I have to swallow my words!! (tee hee - I hope you know I'm only joking) :-)

Thank you for taking the time to write such lovely long comments; I really appreciate it. And I'm so glad you're enjoying it so far. I'm still having nail-biting moments about this fic (and moments where I could chuck the computer at the wall, which wouldn't please my parents too much as its brand new!). Writing a multichapter fic is definitely new for me in this fandom, and its proving to be a lot harder than I'd expected!

And, ooh. I hadn't considered "the Lestranges' toyboy, but you're right. Much more perverted. Although I'm not sure Bellatrix would be the type to openly share. I'm sure she hoarded every away from Narcissa and Andromeda when they were little!

Urgh, I knew Finnegan was wrong. Lol, I seriously spent a good three minutes typing it one way and the other because I didn't have my book on me and it seemed to be spelt both ways on the net. Thanks for making the quibble! I'll fix it on the hard copy.

And I really hope you don't have to swallow your words, lol. Although I won't be the best judge; more often than not, I think what I write is rubbish.

I am in love.  This story is brilliant!  It's reminding me of the stupendous Test of Time by Alchemilla (see it at SQ), which happens to be my favorite piece. ever. and you are well on your way.  At last, a story that establishes relationships, careers, and plot without the rehashing of everything in canon.  Believe me, I know what happened in the books; I'm interested in this new tale you've got unraveling before me!  The dialogue was brilliant and peffectly awkward at times. I loved the unmistakeable Weasley tone in this: "A wholly nasty creature, who should be snogging Dementors. "    Not only that, but you appease the inevitable ship-hunger in the first section (Will four o'clock ever come? )  I cannot wait to see this story unfold!

Delani

Your review massively cheered up my day today, so thank you!  It's an enormous compliment and such a relief that you're enjoying it, because I was just about chewing my nails off posting it! I just hope the rest lives up to your expectations - I don't think I'm going to be any less nervous about the next chapters, hee. I have renewed admiration for all the authors on here who write long fics.

And there'll definitely be H/G moments. I'm a fluff fan all the way.

Excellent Chapter.

I have one English quibble though.  You wrote: "as her body struggled to orientate itself ".  The appropriate word is "orient" from which "orientating" and other words were formed.   "Orientate" is an awkward back-formation that has only recently entered the dictionary because so many people are now (mis)using it.  It is a [Mid-19th century. Back-formation < orientation]

Orient entered the language in the 14th century.

Thank you!

And thank you for the advice on that sentence - I've already changed it to "orient" in my hard copy of the chapter. It does sound better; I thought that line was a bit chunky. And I always appreciate a heads up on these things, so I (hopefully) don't do them again. :)

I apologise if you end up getting three different replies to this, but my computer keeps having annoying lazy moments and freezing on me. Thank you; I really, really appreciate your comments. I'm still so nervous about this fic - I'd forgotten how much harder it is to write a long fic than a one-shot! :)