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Author: Tosca Story: Salvation Rating: Teens Setting: Pre-HBP Status: WIP Warning: Death Reviews: 12 Words: 43,392
Chapter Four: Vow ~*~ "They found him." Bringing his head up from Ginny's hair, Harry gazed at Dumbledore with empty eyes. The sun was just peeking over the horizon, casting a pinkish glow across the sky. The storms had passed, leaving peace in their wake. He felt Ginny shift in his arms and turn her head towards the headmaster standing in her doorway. Breathing in slowly, he tightened his grip on her body. Dumbledore came further into the room. "It seems Professor Snape was able to alert the Order of where the enemy was keeping him. With his help, they infiltrated the headquarters. Voldemort was already gone by the time they got there," he said softly. "Is he dead?" Harry asked quietly, numb to the mighty grief threatening to overwhelm him. Ginny shivered in his arms. "No; he's at St. Mungo's." Sitting up abruptly, Ginny looked up at Harry with wide eyes. "Harry, you have to go see him," she whispered, voice hoarse from her nightmares. "He needs you." Nodding slowly, he stood, Ginny at his side. "When can I go to see him?" he asked, voice toneless. He wasn't going to break, not now; later, when everything was all over, he would feel his rage and sorrow. It was too soon now. "Now, if you want to. Ginny can go with you as well; she was leaving for London today anyway," Dumbledore said wearily, his sorrow and tiredness etched onto the lines in his face. "I will transport her things to the Leaky Cauldron; they will be there when she arrives." "Thank you," Ginny said softly from Harry's side. Harry steeled himself. "Go on and get dressed, Gin; I'll wait for you," he said, letting her go for the first time in hours. * When he and Ginny entered the wing of St Mungo's where Dumbledore said Remus was located, they found Ron, Hermione, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and Tonks all in chairs outside his room. Tonks saw them first, and Harry's resolve almost shattered at the sight of her teary, bloodshot eyes and pale face. She jumped from her chair and pulled them both into a tight embrace. "Oh god, Harry... I'm glad you're here," she whispered in his ear before releasing him and Ginny. Everyone else rose and came towards them. Hermione and Mrs. Weasley looked very much like Tonks did, with paling faces and tear-streaked cheeks. Ron glanced nervously at Ginny before going to Harry and giving him a brotherly embrace. As Harry returned it, he saw Ginny hugging her parents for the first time in near a month, and wasn't surprised to see a few stray tears slide down her face. Hermione was next to hug him; she also slipped a thick envelope in his hand as she let him go. "We got our school letters this morning; I brought you yours," she said softly. "Oh, Harry!" Mrs. Weasley came up and hugged him to her tightly, smoothing his hair down and kissing his cheek. "Oh, my dear, dear boy..." Returning her embrace, he pushed all his conflicting feelings beneath his conscious thought; he was not going to break down in front of all of them. Still, he took comfort in the support evident in the little group. "How is he?" he asked as Mrs. Weasley released him. Tonks looked away towards the floor as Mr. Weasley replied. "It wasn't good when I brought him in; the medi-wizards haven't said anything to us, but I think..." he trailed off, clearly at a loss for words. "He's going to die," Harry said flatly, causing everyone except Ginny to flinch at his tone. Hermione shook her head, wiping her eyes quickly. "There's always a chance, Harry. These are the best medi-wizards, and-" "He wants to die," Ginny said softly, drawing everyone's attention. She was standing near the door of Remus' room, eyes dark and hollow. "I felt it last night, and I can feel it now. It's like an aura in the air." Ron shook his head incredulously at his sister, eyes wide. "No one wants to die," he said stubbornly. "Why would Remus?" It suddenly occurred to Harry that no one except he and Ginny knew what Remus had done as a full werewolf. The thought relieved him; Remus could be at peace with that. No one needed to know about the girl. What of the girl? He turned to Mr. Weasley and pulled him aside abruptly. "Did you find anyone else at the hideout, sir?" he asked quickly. Bitterness crept into Arthur Weasley's usually clear gaze, a gaze that had seen too much death for one lifetime. "There was the body of a young girl, ripped to pieces," he said darkly. "We think they tortured her for fun." Harry's stomach clenched tightly; he shut his eyes. He couldn't handle this now; why was he here? He should have waited to come, it was too soon- A gentle arm slipped around his waist, and he felt someone press their cheek to his shoulder. "It's ok, Harry; you need to be here," he heard Ginny say softly. "Harry?" Opening his eyes, he turned to see a distraught Tonks standing by an older medi-wizard. Ginny kept her arm around his waist as Tonks motioned him closer to the door of Remus' room. "You should go in and see him; he was asking for you when I left him last," Tonks said quietly, knuckles white. Blood icy, Harry nodded. His stomach churned uncomfortably as he glanced at the off-white door. The arm fell away from his waist. "I'll wait out here for you, Harry," Ginny said gently. He looked down at her, desperation seeping into his veins. He couldn't go in there by himself; he wouldn't be able to handle it. "No; come with me. He'll want to see you too," he protested, taking her hand in his. Her eyes widened; he could see the fear shining in them. "But what if-" "Gin, I need you. Please come with me," he pleaded softly. Ginny looked if she were about to hesitate, but her mother spoke before she could. "Go, Ginny; we've all seen him, and you have to as well. Don't be afraid, dear," Mrs. Weasley said, patting Ginny on the shoulder. With a resolute nod, Ginny nodded at Harry, and they both entered the dark room. * Watching as Harry and Ginny went into Remus' room, Hermione felt like crying all over again. When she had first heard the news of Remus' capture, she had been eating dinner with Ron and Harry, and it had been a shock to everyone. Then, she had been shaken awake by Ron very early this morning, and he had told her that his dad and other Order members had gone after Remus. She had clung to him until Tonks came to take them to St. Mungo's, crying into his shoulder and wondering why Harry wasn't with them. When she saw Harry walk in with Ginny, it had all clicked; he must have gone to Hogwarts to tell her. Maybe she had even had a vision of it, if Voldemort had opened their link. Had Harry told her of the spell that could save her yet? Hermione didn't think so. Obviously, after this, a decision would be made about it quickly. "How's my Head Girl doing?" She looked at Ron, who was trying to smile at her, and a tear fell from her eye. "That doesn't seem important anymore," she murmured, wondering if Harry would open his letter with Remus to see if he was Head Boy. Ron slipped his arms around her, pulling her to his warm form. "Remus would think it was important, Hermione. He would care." She was silent as he rocked her, watching the Weasleys and Tonks converse quietly a little ways away from them. Poor Tonks, who had hardly begun to have any kind of relationship with Remus. They barely got time to themselves because of Order business, and if they did, it was usually a few moments; not enough for everything she must have wanted to tell him. Hermione's heart broke for the Auror; to lose someone so quickly and so young... It made her think of losing Ron. And the thought horrified her. "Why was Ginny here, do you think?" Ron asked quietly, breaking the silence between them. She looked up at him curiously. "Why not? She has every right to be here; she's as close as we are to Remus." He looked uncomfortable, eyes sliding from her to the door and back. "Well, what if... What if Voldemort found out about the service through her? It's possible; Harry wrote her the day before," he said hesitantly. Gaping at him, she moved out of the circle of his arms. "You think this was Ginny's fault?" she hissed. "I hope you don't say that to anyone else; she would have said something if she knew it was her fault. She tells Dumbledore everything!" "I can't help thinking it! How do we know what's going on in her mind, Hermione? How do we know if she'll give away the location of headquarters, or secrets she knows about the Order? This is serious!" he exclaimed, earning sharp glances from his parents. Hermione shook her head in disbelief. "There is a reason she has been isolated from all of us, Ron. Don't you remember that she's been gone? Or didn't you notice?" she asked bitterly. "After all, she is only your little sister." Ron frowned. "Hermione, that's not what I meant," he said quietly. "I... I just don't know how to handle this." She gazed at him from a few feet away, letting the words disappear between them. Sighing heavily, he met her fiery gaze. "I'm sorry, Hermione. I didn't mean what I said, honestly," he said pleadingly, reaching out for her. "Please don't get angry with me now. I know I'm a prat, but I need you." Tears filled her eyes again; she went back into his arms, holding him even more tightly. Her gaze went to Tonks again, and her heart clenched. Please, let him live, for her. * The room was dark; with the shades drawn, only a few slivers of morning's light slipped into the room. It was enough to see the bandaged, bloodied figure lying on the bed. His eyes were closed when Harry and Ginny entered, but they opened a crack at the sound of the door closing. A small smile crossed the bruised face. "Harry; I was hoping you would be here," he said roughly, the voice a distorted, scratchy version of the familiar. With Ginny nudging him from behind, Harry swallowed and walked forward, fists clenched. He felt his school letter crumple under the pressure of his hand. "Hello, Remus. How are you feeling?" he asked, voice leaving him as he saw the extent of his friend's visible injuries. Past the smile, there were claw marks all over Remus' face and neck, which were smothered in a healing ointment, stark red against the pale skin. His left arm was in a sling; his right was bruised beyond belief. Harry couldn't see anything else because of the blankets around Remus' torso and legs, but he could only imagine what other injuries there were. Ginny gasped quietly at his side; he felt her shudder. Remus' eyes went from Harry to Ginny and back. "I feel... I feel unclean," he replied soberly, the smile disappearing from his face. Harry felt his throat close up; Ginny grasped his hand tightly. "Oh, Remus..." she whispered, tears filling her eyes. "I'm so sorry." The man inhaled apprehensively. "Do you know what I did?" he asked slowly. She nodded tearfully. "Voldemort... I felt it," she said weakly. Harry watched his friend's eyes widen as they came back to him. He nodded, feeling the first pangs of grief strike him, and strugled to hold himself together. Remus shut his eyes. "I don't even recall... I just know it. The werewolf in me relished it..." he trailed off, voice breaking. Silence fell in the room; Harry felt his insides knot together as he ran his thumb across Ginny's knuckles in comfort. What could he say? What was there to say now? "What's in your hand, Harry?" Remus' thin question startled him from his thoughts. He unclenched his hand and looked at the wrinkled envelope. "My school letter. Hermione gave it to me," he said softly. Remus smiled weakly. "Open it up. I want to know something," he commented. Letting go of Ginny's hand, he ripped open the envelope and shook the contents out onto his palm. A shining Head Boy badge fell out along with the usual letter. He gaped and looked up to meet Remus' pleased eyes. "I wasn't a prefect, though!" he exclaimed. "Neither was your father," Remus replied softly. Harry raised his eyebrows, hand clenched around the badge. "Really?" "Upset many a male prefect, but there it is," Remus said with a slightly humorous tone. "I was hoping this would happen." Heart falling to the floor, Harry stepped closer to the bed. "Remus, I'm sorry. If it hadn't-" "Quiet, Harry," Remus interjected, reaching over with his good hand to place it on Harry's arm. "This isn't your fault at all. Taking on all the blame for everything bad that happens is not the answer, all right? It's over, and I've accepted it." There was a finality in his tone that didn't sit well with Harry. "You're going to be fine, right?" he asked, a slight amount of desperation creeping into his voice. Ginny put her hand on his shoulder as Remus smiled sadly at Harry. "Harry, look what I've done. I can't live with myself with the death of that innocent child on my soul. And I've done all I can to absolve myself," he said softly. "You can't die, Remus. What about Tonks?" Harry asked. What about me? Shaking his head slightly, Remus sighed. "Tonks will be fine in time; she'll remember me fondly. And, I'm not worried about you anymore, Harry. Not like I used to worry." Shell-shocked, Harry just listened to Remus' frail voice. "After Sirius died, you were the only thing I was living for, Harry. I made a vow to him that night that I would be there for you like he was supposed to be there; I don't think I did such a bad job, hmm?" Remus chuckled hoarsely. Harry shook his head, trying to control the sorrow and grief swelling within him. "You were great, Remus; No one could have been better," he assured the injured man swiftly, feeling Ginny's hand tighten on his shoulder. A warm smile grew on Remus' bloodied face. "I'm glad you were happy, Harry. I tried so hard to be what you needed. I grew to love you like a son; if I was ever to have had a son, I would have wanted him to be like you. And I know Sirius felt the same way." He winced, breathing shallowly. Harry started, and Ginny leaned forward. "Are you all right, Remus?" she asked worriedly, voice thick with tears. Eyes settling on Ginny, the small smile returned to his face. "I forgot you were here, Ginny; you were so quiet," he commented softly. "You're the reason I can feel fine with leaving Harry, you know." The breath caught in Harry's throat as Ginny's eyes widened. Remus chuckled slightly and nodded. "You're his support, his faith, his hope; you can be everything he needs, in one person. You love him, and he loves you; the both of you will be able to survive anything if you have each other," he finished quietly. "It's the only thing Voldemort doesn't understand: love." Tears burned behind Harry's eyes for the first time in a long time, but he held them back, taking a deep breath. Ginny took his hand, squeezing tightly; he could hear her quiet sobs. Remus smiled slightly. "Now, go on; I want to see Tonks," he said with forced cheer. "I'll come back later," Harry said quickly. Remus shook his head. "No, Harry! Don't come back," he said firmly. "It's time for me to go; your parents and Sirius are waiting for me." Desperation overwhelmed Harry; this couldn't be happening to Remus, immovable Remus! "Remus, you can't leave! Not now, not when we're so close to beating him," he pleaded. Cool hands touched his arms as Remus gave him a bittersweet smile. "I'm not leaving, just how Sirius and your parents never left you. Your father is your Patronus; your mother has her protection over you. Sirius and I will always be with you, watching you. If you ever need us, we'll be here. The dead who we truly love never leave us; you know that," he said softly. Harry could see the beginning of sorrow and pain in his eyes, completely unrelated to his injuries. "I'm so sorry, Remus," Ginny breathed, not bothering to wipe the tears from her face. "I should have done something, anything-" "This wasn't your fault either, Ginny; don't you and Harry go and make yourselves miserable with guilt, all right? You still have things to do, like get married and raise a family," Remus said as he interrupted her. A wistful look flashed in his eyes. "If anything, you two will have beautiful children." Leaning down, Ginny pressed a chaste kiss to Remus' brow. "You were always so kind to me, Remus; thank you," she whispered thickly, stepping away to let Harry say his farewell. Harry and Remus looked at each other silently for a moment; in his mind, Harry promised that if he and Ginny did survive this war and got married, their first son would be named for Remus. Abruptly, Harry leaned down and awkwardly embraced Remus, trying to avoid hurting him further. A pain he hadn't felt since Sirius' death came back with rough force, threatening to drown him and render him useless. Oh god, why him? Returning the embrace with his one good arm, Remus patted Harry on the back. "Don't be afraid to let go; you still have many to lean upon," he said quietly into Harry's ear. "And love her, Harry; just let go and love her." Nodding, Harry released Remus for the last time. "Thank you, Remus, for everything. I..." He trailed off, seeing the understanding in the other man's eyes. "I know, Harry. Goodbye," he said gently. He couldn't bear it anymore; Harry turned away, walking past Ginny to the door. Entering the bright hallway, his eyes struggled to adjust and he shook his head, moving past his stricken friends and breaking out into a run. He dodged nurses with carts and medi-wizards to finally find a deserted corridor. Leaning against a wall, he sunk down to a sitting position, bringing his knees up to his chin, putting his head in his hands, and began to shake with repressed sobs. He'd lost everything he'd ever known about his parents or his life before Voldemort; now all he had was death and loneliness to keep him company. If Remus could be taken so easily, what was next? It was pure torture; he longed to just cry, but the emotional walls he had perfected over the years were too strong. He needed someone; he needed Ginny. "Harry?" Looking up through hooded eyes, he saw her small form standing over him, face pale and eyes as blurry as his. She knelt beside him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, and pushed the fringe from his gaze. "I'm so sorry, Harry; I wish I could do something," she murmured. She could do something; he lifted his hands to her and framed her face, bringing it closer to his. "Don't leave me," he ordered roughly, voice cracking. Tears fell freely from her eyes as she kissed him. "Never." ~*~ The next days were silent; Ginny spent her days and nights in Harry's company, always by his side but staying rather quiet as he mourned the loss of a man who had become like a brother or father to him. Keeping to her vow to him, she left him rarely, and then only for a few minutes. She was afraid of what he would do if left alone for a long period of time. To the shock of all, Harry refused to return to Grimmauld Place. Instead, he collected all his belongings and roomed with Ginny at the Leaky Cauldron for the remainder of August, which was only a few days. Strangely enough, none of the adults made a fuss; they simply accepted it as they accepted everything else. No one even reminded her of keeping her distance; it was a moot point now. She and Harry were directly connected in many ways, and Ginny's promise to Harry was just the verbal acknowledgement of what was obvious on physical and emotional levels. The Order couldn't take the chance for another memorial service, what with Death Eaters watching their every move, so Dumbledore took care of Remus' funeral arrangements, having him buried by Lily and James Potter near Godric's Hollow. Harry had protested mightily at not being allowed to pay his respects, but Dumbledore had insisted they all keep a low profile until they were safe at Hogwarts. Ginny only saw Tonks a few times after that day in St Mungo's, and when she did see her, the sight of her bereft eyes and hollow face made her want to cry. She couldn't imagine losing her loved one, not so young and so soon after getting together; she wasn't able to visual mourning Harry. Mourning Remus was one of the most difficult times in her life to date; she went back and forth in her mind, thinking of ways she could have saved him, but it all came to nothing. He was dead, and she was left to set Harry to rights before Voldemort took advantage of his weakened state. It had been the silent vow she and Remus had shared by his bedside, sealed by her kiss; she would never abandon Harry, not while she had breath in her body. Lying awake in her bed the night before September 1st, Ginny was thinking along those lines when the floorboards creaked. She turned to her side and saw Harry's shadowed figure rising from his bed and moving lithely towards hers. He hadn't done this before; in the night, he usually stayed awake and waited for the dawn so he could pretend he had slept. She always stayed up with him, just in case he should need her in his silent reverie, but he never did. It was a seclusion she didn't like, but she didn't want to push him so soon after Remus' death. But he was watching her now, looking for any sign of wakefulness in her face. "Ginny?" His voice was hoarse; she missed the smooth, deep voice that soothed her in the Hogwarts corridor only a few short weeks ago. "I'm awake, Harry," she said, sitting up in her bed. Nodding, he sat down next to her, bed sagging under both their weights. She didn't touch him, and he made no move towards her. They just sat together, watching the gibbous moon cross the inky sky above the roofs of London. Ginny ached for him, wanted desperately to heal his broken mind. Finally, he inhaled deeply. "Do you... Do you think we'll survive, Ginny?" he asked quietly, eyes focused on the sky. She shifted closer to him. "Yes; I know we will," she replied with complete conviction. "How? How do you know?" he asked, eyes meeting hers. The sorrow in the green irises frightened her. "Why do we survive and others don't?" Exhaling slowly, she kept his gaze. "I don't know why some people die and others live, Harry," she began softly. "But I do know that we will live. Don't you?" He shrugged helplessly. "I don't know anymore; how can I beat him? He's taken so much from me; how do I fight him?" The shaky words scared her to her heart, and she moved closer to him. Their hands brushed accidentally, sending a shiver up her spine. "With everything you have. You still have Remus, and Sirius, and you parents by your side, Harry; they'll never leave you. And Ron and Hermione will do anything for you," she said, letting her knuckles stroke his hand gently. His fingers twined with hers. "What about you?" he murmured, gazing at her with dark eyes. She felt heat come unbidden to her face as he looked at her. "I'll never leave you; I promised you that." He watched her for a moment, eyes searching hers. His free hand came up to trace the planes of her face, calloused against the smoothness of her face. "Are you sure?" His query was no more than a breath, and yet it struck her harder than any shout. He was insecure in her love for him; she should have expected something like this, when he had just lost someone so dear. Still, it stung for a moment until she realized he wasn't trying to hurt her; he was only trying to reassure himself. Gently, she leaned forward and kissed him briefly. "I love you, Harry," she murmured against his lips. "I will never leave you." Abruptly, he took her fully into his arms, kissing her with a desperation she had never felt from him before as he reached up and pulled her hair from its ribbon, tangling a hand in her dark strands. She opened up to him, feeling nothing but his love for her mixed with the anguish and sorrow of the last few days. It was when he pushed her flat to the bed and his lips began to travel lower that she realized that she hadn't heard a word from Tom since the night of her vision of Remus. Blissful freedom blossomed within her, and she twined her fingers in Harry's thick hair as they nearly lost themselves to the sorrow of the night. ~*~ The next morning was remarkably calm, considering all things; Harry and Ginny made it to Kings Cross without difficulty, and the glances they shared did nothing but cause gentle blushing. Ginny herself wasn't confused or frazzled; she accepted him as she had accepted everything else, and she wasn't afraid. Her parents were waiting with Ron and Hermione at Platform 3/4, somber and quietly sympathetic. It was a silent farewell; both her mother and father embraced all of them in turn, holding on tightly, as if they didn't want to let go. Ginny said nothing and just held her parents, knowing what she might lose very soon. After giving their farewells, the four teens got on the train and found their usual compartment. Ginny was struck with memories of past journeys to Hogwarts, remembering last year's in particular. She had had such a different perspective on her life then; how could things change so quickly? Maybe she was finally making the transition from teen to adult; it seemed she realized what was really important in the grand scheme of her life. Once their things were all settled in, Hermione, Harry, and Ron stood. "We have to go to the prefect meeting, Ginny," Ron said quietly. "We'll be back soon." Briefly feeling a slight amount of fear at being left alone, she nodded slightly, meeting Harry's gaze. Inside his green eyes, he looked as if he didn't want to leave her, like he would collapse if she wasn't right with him, and her heart hurt. "I'll be here when you get back," she said softly, more for Harry than anyone else. He gave her a slight smile, which looked foreign on his masked face after the last few days, and the three of them left the compartment silently. Ginny sighed, leaning back in her plush seat, and gazed out the window. The train gave a violent shudder as it began to chug out of the station; she could hear the peppy chatter of her fellow students through the walls. It almost sickened her as the train picked up speed, passing London in a near-blur. How could they be so cheerful? Didn't they understand what was happening within their world? Her disgust was short-lived; she knew it was ridiculous to ask those questions. Her peers may not fully grasp what was happening, but they were aware of it. They were just trying to live their lives as best as they could, like Remus had told her and Harry to do. Eyes drifting shut, she curled closer to the cushions of her chair, wrapping her arms around herself. Sleep would revive her; last night's brief nap had been the first real sleep she had gotten in days. Hopefully whatever was keeping Tom at bay would stay put; not only did she want sleep, she wanted to stay as close to Harry as possible. You amuse me, Virginia. The werewolf is dead; another one of Harry's loved ones gone because of him. Don't you think about who could be next? Maybe it's you. Still she slept. Hushed voices stirred her as she felt the train take a gentle curve. Tom's words were clear in her mind, causing a shiver to run through her body. A hand lay upon her head gently; she felt a familiar warmth in the seat next to her. Eyes opening slowly, she met Harry's weary gaze. "Is he there?" he asked quietly, unnoticed by Ron and Hermione, who were having a soft conversation in the seats across from them. There was no need to define "he." She nodded. Harry let his hand drop from her head to her shoulder, wrapping an arm around her shoulders; his other hand slipped into hers. Immediately Tom's presence disappeared from her mind, and she shifted closer to Harry's warm form, both perplexed and relieved. "Harry?" she murmured. "Hmm?" he said, running his thumb back and forth across her knuckles. She bit her lip, looking up at him beneath her lashes. "When you're near me, he's not there," she said softly, catching Hermione's ear. The older girl glanced at Ginny, nodding briefly as Ron continued to talk. Harry's gaze didn't change. "I know, Ginny." He let out a long sigh; she could feel it reverberate through his limbs. "We need to talk about that. But not now." Heart pounding against her ribs, she continued to watch Harry's expression as the distance to Hogwarts lessened. His face was smooth; only she could see the inner scars of grief, pain, vengeance. They were invisible compared to the stark scar on his forehead. He gave nothing away, and she was overcome; what could he know? Had someone found something for her troubles? She could only hope so; she was not about to break her promises. ~*~ The Great Hall was awash in candlelight as Harry entered, Ginny at his side and Hermione and Ron right behind them. It was a soft, comforting glow that gave Harry support as he walked past the staff table, struggling to ignore the empty seat between Snape and McGonagall. It was hard to come back to a school that reminded him so much of those he had lost; he couldn't think of the Great Hall without being assaulted with memories of Remus' stories from his school days; the rows his parents had in front of the student body, the pranks the Marauders used to pull. Harry was quite tense by the time they found their seats; only Ginny's hand in his kept him from bolting. It isn't right, he thought as the Sorting Hat was brought out and began to sing. Remus didn't deserve anything bad that happened to him; why was he chosen? It was a question that had haunted him for days since Remus' death. He couldn't answer it, and he didn't know who to go to for answers, which was frustrating. Maybe there wasn't an answer. Death was intangible, though ever prevalent in his life, and he barely knew where to start with it. How did it choose who was to go and who was to stay? Was it a matter of fate or just by chance? He shook his head slightly, clearing his mind; he had to stop with the morbid thoughts, before he drove himself crazy. Feeling Ginny squeeze his hand gently underneath the table, his eyes drifted to her profile, heart speeding up as he watched her. It was like Hermione had said; his presence blocked Voldemort from Ginny's mind. Now all there was to do was tell Ginny of what had been found, and wait for her reaction. It had to be soon; it had to be tonight. He had to confess; he didn't mind having to do this particular protection spell with Ginny. After the intoxicating experience of last night, it was all he could do not to have her in the middle of the Sorting. And while they hadn't gone all the way last night, it had almost gone that far; he had stopped them before he had completely lost himself. But he had wanted to; he had wanted to desperately. Ginny made him whole, made him feel nothing but the good in his life; he was willing to do whatever necessary to save her. Finally, the Sorting was over; everyone was ready for supper, but Dumbledore stood at the staff table, a somber expression in his usually cheerful eyes. A silence blanketed the hall as he moved his gaze across the sea of students. Harry's stomach knotted as he felt Ginny tense; he knew what was coming. The headmaster cleared his throat. "Welcome back, everyone. I'm sure you're hungry, but I must make my usual speech; it is more important than usual." Everyone kept their eyes on Dumbledore. Harry's lungs constricted tightly. "First, it is my regret to say that due to the conflict with Voldemort, I must cancel all Quidditch matches and Hogsmeade visits until further notice," Dumbledore said firmly, eliciting gasps of horror and disbelief from around the Hall. Ron himself let out a shout as Harry blinked incredulously. That was something he hadn't expected at all. Waiting for the cries to subside, Dumbledore stayed silent until quiet was restored. "It is for the safety of the school; I would rather not do it, but I must. The Forbidden Forest is off-limits, especially this year. Mr. Filch has added fifty items to his list, which you may check if you wish." He paused, and picked up his goblet; Harry felt his stomach fall to his feet. "You may have noticed the empty seat at the staff table tonight; it is my deep sorrow to inform you that Remus Lupin was captured and killed by Voldemort this past summer," he said softly. The room was completely silent; Harry glanced around and saw many of his peers with stricken looks upon their faces. Dumbledore continued steadily, the light in his eyes completely gone. "He was a wonderful man, an example of one who lived through turmoil and remained hopeful for the future. A man who had a gift with teaching, he is something any person would wish to have in their life. We mourn his loss; will everyone please stand and raise their glasses to an excellent man?" Grief stabbed Harry as he shuffled to his feet, the goblet in his hand shaking silently. Ginny kept their free hands interlaced, keeping him grounded even as tears slid down her cheeks. As Dumbledore drank, so did every student in the hall, including the Slytherins. Harry felt an ache blossom in his heart as he drank; was this all the tribute he would be able to give to Remus, a man who never strayed? It hurt to think so. That was the final deciding factor; as everyone sat, and the food appeared in front of them, Harry leaned over and put his mouth near Ginny's ear. "We need to talk to Dumbledore after dinner, Ginny. Will you wait with me?" he asked quietly, briefly brushing his lips across her skin. She turned her face to meet his eyes; he saw the love and pain shining in her gaze. "Of course, Harry," she replied, leaning forward and kissing his cheek quickly. He nodded, and turned to his plate, a latent need for vengeance filling him. It was time to fight back. ~*~
A/N: Please don't hate me, all you Remus lovers. I am a Remus lover myself, and I didn't want to kill him. It didn't even occur to me until I wrote Chapter Three, and now I have to finish the job. How could he live with himself, I ask you? *sigh* I'm sure I'll be flamed, so don't be afraid to join the club. Many thanks to Anne, who was a wonderful support during the trying days of Remus. Thanks to Joe, fabulous man that he is! I don't know what I would do without him. *sniff* Also, many apologies to Lizzie; I shall never sin again. Please read and review. Or send death threats, whichever you prefer. >.<
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