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Author: Faelaern Story: Cry Havoc Rating: Teens Setting: Pre-HBP Status: Completed Reviews: 14 Words: 30,131
Like a tide recedes from rocky shores (Assemblage 23)
The Daily Prophet had written up a front page story of the attack at Grimmauld Place. As hard as it was to believe, the events of July 30th, 1996 were far worse than Harry had initially thought. The main reason that they hadn't seen any immediate sign of Muggles during the battle was that the Death Eaters had gone through and silenced them beforehand. Eleven Muggles were murdered for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and twenty-six survivors had to have their memories heavily modified - the Muggle news was reporting the disaster as a chemical spill. Harry reckoned the body count would have been higher if the Death Eaters hadn't been intent on stealth. Harry's thoughts turned toward the Order casualties thus far - fifteen dead, now including Sturgis, Ryan, and Yasmeen. Fleur was permanently blind, and Bill had taken a leave from work to take her home to France. Harry didn't know how Fleur's family would react, but he hoped Bill wouldn't catch hell from them for something that wasn't his, Bill's, fault. Harry's eyes turned once again to the Firebolt that was lying next to him on the stands. He had initially come out here to practice, hoping a good fly would help to clear his head. He'd expected that flying the Firebolt would bring back memories of Sirius, both good and bad, and had been all right with that while he was carrying it to the Pitch. When he reached his destination, however, he'd found he couldn't bring himself to mount his broom. Instead, he'd climbed the stands and sat to think. He didn't know how long he'd been sitting, but it must have been a good amount of time, as the sun was now starting to set on the horizon line. Harry saw movement out of the corner of his eye and jolted out of his reverie, reaching to his forearm to pull his wand. He stopped mid-draw when he saw it was Hermione, and sighed heavily. He'd told them he wanted to be alone for a few hours, was that really too much to ask? "What do you want?" asked Harry when Hermione came close enough to talk to without shouting. "Harry, you've been out for five hours," said Hermione. "So what if I have?" Harry snapped. "I asked to be left alone didn't I?" "I know you did, but I just heard something from Professor Dumbledore that I thought might interest you," said Hermione carefully. "What is it?" asked Harry. "Is everyone -" Hermione held up a hand. "No one else has been hurt. Dumbledore has gone to Saint Mungo's to get Professor Lupin. He's left Kingsley and Mad-Eye here to keep an eye on things. "Lupin is coming here?" asked Harry, now interested. "Yes, Dumbledore said to expect them in about an hour," said Hermione. Harry stood up and grabbed his Firebolt. "D'you think Voldemort would try anything..." Hermione shook her head. "Not with Dumbledore with him." "No, I mean here," said Harry. "What if he's been watching us?" "Mad-Eye is watching the Marauder's Map, and Kingsley is patrolling; I think between the two of them we'll be all right." Dumbledore had asked Harry for the map when they'd arrived at Hogwarts, apologizing but saying that it would be an invaluable tool for school security, particularly once term started. Harry had handed it over without fuss, embarrassed that he hadn't thought of that function beforehand. "Harry," said Hermione. "Can I... well... I wanted to talk to you about -" "That's not a terribly good idea right now," said Harry, cutting her off. Hermione huffed impatiently. "You didn't even know what I was going to say!" "Cedric, Sirius, Jean-Philippe, Sturgis... does it really matter? I don't want to talk about them," said Harry. Hermione's eyes narrowed. "I want to talk about Kreacher." "That's brill, Hermione, why don't you go talk to Ron? He'll put up with that bollocks from you for some reason. I won't." Hermione looked at him in shock for a moment before the tears started to roll down her face. Harry threw her a cold stare. "Do we understand each other now?" Hermione's lip trembled. "I w-wanted to tell you t-that...oh never mind!" She turned her back on him and ran down the stands. Harry shrugged and stayed where he was; he was sick of hearing anything to do with that damned house elf. He barely noticed the darkening skies clouding over, and was therefore surprised when the first drops of rain hit his head. The few drops quickly escalated into a full downpour. With a yell of frustration, Harry threw aside his resolution not to fly the Firebolt and mounted his broom. He made a dozen laps around the pitch as the storm picked up; lightning flashed in the distance and deafening rolls of thunder sounded soon afterwards. Harry ignored them and flew on, rising several hundred feet through the pelting sheets of rain. On sudden impulse he dove towards the ground at full speed, stopping only centimetres from the turf and pulling sharply upward in a near-perfect Wronski Feint. He shot upward and away from the pitch, then brought his broom down low to hurtle across the Hogwarts grounds at breakneck speed. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the door to Hagrid's cabin open as he rushed by. He turned sharply to see Ginny running out into the rain towards him. Slowing, he shot towards her and stopped a few metres over her head. "What's up?" he hollered through the rain. "Harry, what the hell are you doing?" Ginny yelled. He tried to reply but was cut off by another loud crack of thunder. "WHAT?" Ginny shouted, louder this time. Sighing, Harry lowered himself to the ground and dismounted. "I was flying, what did it look like?" "It looked like you were trying to get yourself killed," said Ginny, running forward and pulling him into a hug, which Harry returned stiffly. "I'm not allowed to fly fast now, is that it?" he demanded. "You were alone, in the middle of a thunder storm, off of the Quidditch pitch, on the broom given to you by your dead godfather?" Ginny demanded. "Yeah, I was," said Harry, pulling out of her hug. "D'you have a problem with that?" Ginny opened her mouth, closed it, then said, "No. No I don't. Do you mind if I join you?" "Suit yourself," said Harry. "Hagrid's here?" "He was wondering if you were going to come to see him," said Ginny. "He thinks you're mad at him because of something he said back in June." "Oh! No, it's nothing like that," said Harry, now walking quickly towards Hagrid's hut. It hadn't even occurred to him that Hagrid was here; he normally saw Hagrid only while school was in session, so the idea just hadn't occurred to him. Hagrid was standing in the open doorway, watching the rain, apparently. "Hagrid!" Harry called. "All righ', Harry?" Hagrid asked. "I'm sorry I didn't stop in earlier," he said as he reached his giant friend. "Don' think nothin' of it!" said Hagrid. "Come on inside! An' you too, Ginny! What yer mother would say ter me if she saw I let yeh out in this!" he exclaimed, gesturing to the storm around them with a massive hand. "Yer a wonder on your broomstick, Harry," said Hagrid, as he grabbed an enormous towel and threw it around Harry and Ginny to dry them somewhat. "Some people think I'm being reckless," said Harry, glancing sidelong at Ginny. "Look, I'm sorry, Harry," said Ginny. "I'm just a bit edgy, after what happened yesterday." Harry sighed. "It's all right. I guess I shouldn't be so uptight about people worrying about me." "Well," said Ginny, "it's annoying, isn't it? I'm not saying don't get annoyed, I'm just saying that I am going to worry sometimes." "Yeah," said Harry. "I worry about you too...er, sometimes." "Hold on," said Hagrid slowly. "Are you two...?" "Yeah," said Harry, before he could think about it. "We're a couple." Hagrid grinned. "Well Hermione told me about Ron and her, but I had no idea abou' you two." Harry blushed. He had become so used to being with Ginny that his response had come naturally; of course he was with Ginny, who else would he be with? But he and Ginny had agreed it would be best to keep their relationship a secret while they were at Hogwarts. Could Hagrid be discreet enough not to give them away once term began? Ginny was looking at Harry questioningly. Harry caught her eye and nodded. "Hagrid," he said. "You have to promise not to tell anyone about me and Ginny. Once school starts up, we're going to be keeping it a secret." "What? Why?" asked Hagrid. "Voldemort," said Ginny. Hagrid's eyes widened. "Don't say his name! Great Godric, you were raised a witch; you should know better." "No," said Ginny. "I'm not running from his name anymore." "You put this into her head!" said Hagrid, glaring at Harry. "Hagrid, do you understand about the relationship?" Harry asked, deliberately dodging the accusation. "O' course I do! It's a right smart move, that is. But blimey, Harry, yeh can' go around gettin' people to say You-Know-Who's name! Someone's gonna get hurt!" "We're in the middle of a war," said Ginny softly. "A lot of people are going to get hurt. A lot of people have been hurt." "That's what I'm tryin' ter say!" said Hagrid, throwing up his hands in exasperation. "The numbers are only gonna be higher if you go attractin' his attention." "Lupin says his name," said Harry. "And Sirius did." "And that's got nothing to do with Sirius being dead!" said Ginny, when Hagrid opened his mouth to say something. "All righ', all righ'. Just don't say it around me if you can help it," said Hagrid. "How long 'till Lupin gets here?" asked Harry. "Should be about three quarters of an hour yet," said Ginny, glancing at her watch. "You still up for that broom ride?" asked Harry. "Sure," said Ginny. "My broom's up in my room though." They were all staying in their own rooms in Gryffindor Tower, which were just as well cared-for in the summertime as during the school year. Harry grinned. "Room enough for two on the Firebolt, if you want." Ginny grinned. "You're on!" * By the time three-quarters of an hour had passed, both Harry and Ginny were completely soaked through to the bone. They walked in through the front door, shivering, but with smiles on their faces. "They're taking Lupin to the Hospital Wing?" asked Ginny. "Yeah, I reckon so," said Harry. "D'you think Madam Pomfrey will let us in to see him like this?" "Probably not," said Ginny. "But face it, we're at Hogwarts, the Decree for the Restriction of Underage Wizardry doesn't apply here." She took out her wand and cast a drying charm on Harry. "Hadn't thought of that," said Harry, taking out his own wand to cast the same spell on Ginny. "How do I look?" said Ginny, spinning around with a flourish. Harry grinned; their clothes were both still damp, her hair was in tangles, and a few stray droplets of water were still clinging to her skin. "Absolutely beautiful," he said, in complete honesty. "But I think your mum would have a stroke if she knew we were going to visit Lupin like this." "Good thing she's not here then," said Ginny, with a grin and a slight blush. Mrs Weasley was presently at the Burrow, which was now fully repaired from the damage caused by the Death Eaters and Lupin's werewolf alter-ego. According to her, the house may have been fixed, but it still needed looking after if it wasn't going to fall into disrepair. They made their way down to the Hospital Wing, and were joined en route by Hermione and a disgruntled-looking Ron. "What's your problem?" Harry asked as Ron shouldered past him. Ron half-turned around. "I'll talk to you after we see Lupin," he said with a glare. Harry shrugged. They reached the entrance to the Hospital Wing, which was being guarded by Hagrid, who had his crossbow loaded and ready in his hands. "Go on in, then," said Hagrid, keeping his weapon pointed at the ground. They passed him and walked in to see Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey, and Hestia Jones standing and talking at a bedside with their backs to the doorway. Dumbledore half-turned and saw them. "Ah. Good afternoon. I'm sure -" Someone in the bed, Lupin, Harry assumed, said something in a soft voice to Dumbledore who looked back and shook his head. "I shall do nothing of the sort, Remus." Harry stepped forward. "Professor Lupin?" He stepped past Dumbledore and gasped. Lupin's hair was greyer than Harry had ever seen it. He looked thin and sickly, and one of his arms was in a sling. There was a black eye patch over his right eye, and the look in the left eye was haunted and distant. "Go away, Harry," said Lupin softly. "You shouldn't have come here." "Bollocks!" said Harry firmly, as Ginny, Ron, and Hermione joined him at the bedside. "You're my friend." "Friends don't try to kill each other," said Lupin. "Too right, they don't," said Ron. "But we didn't try to kill you, and you didn't try to kill us, so I don't know why you're bringing that up." "If it hadn't been for Peter, you, Harry, and Ginny would be dead," said Lupin. "You can't tell me that isn't true." "You don't know what would have happened," said Hermione soothingly. "You weren't there, Hermione, please don't speak on things you don't know," said Lupin bitterly. "Or has there been a book written on the event already?" "You weren't there either, Remus," said Dumbledore softly. "It was my body. My body that would have killed them. And eaten them," said Lupin. "SHUT UP!" shouted Harry. "If it weren't for you, when you were in control of your actions, Ginny, Ron, and I would be dead. Or were you thinking Ron and I could take Bellatrix on our own?" "That doesn't excuse -" Remus started. "SHUT UP!" Harry shouted again. "You shut the sodding hell up! If I'm not responsible for getting Sirius killed, then you're damn well not responsible for almost hurting us after saving our lives." "Potter, lower your voice or I'll remove you from the Hospital Wing at once!" said Madam Pomfrey. Hestia was looking at Harry in shock, and even Dumbledore's eyes showed mild surprise. "I should have told somebody about Talos," said Lupin. "Merlin's beard, I should have told Dumbledore ages ago, before they let me into Hogwarts. But I thought I could control him." "Talos is...is what we saw at the Burrow?" asked Ron, tentatively. Lupin nodded. "I'm not just a werewolf, Ron," he said. "I'm a loup-garou." Hermione gasped. "B-but that's impossible! The last loup-garou were hunted down and killed by Cornelius Rascaven in the 17th century." Lupin smiled grimly. "Not quite. You see, Rascaven was a loup-garou." "What in Merlin's name is a loup-garou?" asked Ron. "The loup-garou were a sub-race of werewolves who could shift forms at will," said Hermione. "Quite correct, Miss Granger," said Dumbledore. "You are also correct, or so we thought, that the loup-garou are long vanished from this world. However, it would appear we are both mistaken on that count." "Indeed," said Lupin. "How is that you shifted forms after you had been knocked unconscious?" asked Harry. "Every loup-garou has two very separate personalities inside him - human and werewolf," said Lupin. "Unless one is dominant over the other, the second personality will take over when the first goes dormant - such as on a full moon or during a knockout. The only exception is sleep. I was stronger than my werewolf side; it had been so ever since I was bitten. I don't know why or how that was - but it doesn't matter, because I'm not anymore." "Wait a tic," said Ginny. "If you were stronger than your werewolf side, how come you shift on the full moon?" "That's an excellent question, Ginny," said Lupin. "On the full moon, being a werewolf, I am forced to shift forms. Before the invention of the Wolfsbane Potion, I only had one form that I could shift to. In that form, my mind is much more animalistic, and Talos uses that to gain control. "I can guess what it is that brought your resistance down," said Dumbledore. "But to be certain, can you tell me what caused you to lose control?" "Sirius," said Lupin. "I've always been a stoic person, and that was what kept Talos back. But there was too much emotion from Sirius' death. I couldn't hold him back any longer." "Why...er, why didn't that happen when Harry's parents died?" asked Hermione. "It did," said Lupin. "I disappeared for two years a few days after their deaths and Sirius' being thrown in Azkaban. I went to live in the Forbidden Forest to regain control of myself, or at least keep myself away from people I might hurt." "Well, you came back, didn't you?" said Ron. "You wouldn't have come to teach if you hadn't." "Correct," said Lupin. "I was successful, or so I thought. And when the Wolfsbane Potion was invented, I thought I'd never have to deal with Talos again. Obviously I was wrong. I should have stayed in the forest." "I believe that's exactly the opposite of what young Harry is trying to tell you," said Dumbledore. "The mistakes you made have caused no permanent damage to anyone in this room. I believe I speak for all of us when I say you are forgiven." Harry and the others nodded firmly. "I don't deserve your forgiveness," said Lupin. "Perhaps. Perhaps not," said Dumbledore. "But you are getting it anyway." Lupin sighed. "What about Peter?" "Peter fought Talos," said Hermione. "And while he turned out okay in the end, that doesn't mean he -" "No," said Hestia. "I'm not sure he did turn out okay in the end." "He did save their lives, Hestia," said Lupin. "Yes, and according to Dumbledore he was under a life debt to Harry," said Hestia. "Doing what he did just shows he valued having magic over living, nothing else." "What are you talking about?" asked Harry. Dumbledore sighed. "When a witch or wizard saves the life of a total stranger or an enemy, the person who is saved thereby owes them a life debt. If the person who owes the life debt has a chance to save the life of the person who saved theirs, and chooses not to, then their magical powers are lost forever." "He'd have had no chance then," said Ron. "You-Know-Who certainly wouldn't take him in any more, and he knows we're after him." "Indeed," said Hestia. "And with that silver hand of his, he had a shot at actually killing Remus and coming out on top. He could have gone back to the Death Eaters with his magic still very much with him." "So you didn't kill anyone, and Talos didn't kill anyone who didn't have it coming to them," said Harry. "That doesn't make it right," said Lupin. "We don't have the authority to deal out death, no matter how much a person deserves it. And I know that didn't stop me from trying to kill Bellatrix of my own will." Ginny spoke up, "Maybe they're 'having it coming to them' doesn't make the killing right. But it doesn't always make it wrong, either. Sometimes you don't have a choice - and be honest, you didn't have a choice either way - Talos was in control of your actions." Dumbledore smiled at her. "I couldn't have put it better, myself." Tears formed in Lupin's one good eye. He tried to blink them away, but couldn't, and they began flowing freely down his face. "I don't deserve any of this. I truly don't. But thank you. All of you." Harry rested a hand on Lupin's shoulder. "You'd have done the same for us." Lupin smiled. "Yes, I would have. But... you understand where I have to go as soon as I'm well?" Harry frowned, confused for a moment, but then it dawned on him. "No... not the forest?" Lupin nodded. "I'm afraid so. It's the only way I can get back the control I need to have if I'm going to live near humans." "Do you know what's in that forest?" Ron asked, shaking his head in disbelief. "Yes Ron, I know quite well," said Lupin. "I know what's there, I know what to fight and what to avoid; I know what to eat and what will make me sick, which streams are dangerous and which I can drink from. Furthermore, I'll be able to keep an eye on what's going on in the forest in relation to the Death Eaters. I'm sure you'll agree with me, Albus, that that is a likely avenue of attack if Voldemort does try an attack on the school?" Dumbledore nodded. "I truly wish there were another alternative, but if there is, I do not see it. However, we are agreed, at least, that you will not venture out into the forest until you are fully healed?" "Yes," said Lupin. "We are agreed on that. The Forbidden Forest doesn't take kindly to the sickly and weak." "How long will it take you to heal?" asked Harry. "It'll be a good month at least," said Madam Pomfrey. "The damage silver can do to a werewolf is not to be underestimated - I want to be sure his wounds are completely healed before I'll let him leave this Hospital Wing. "A month," said Harry. "So he'll still be here when school starts?" "Most definitely," said Madam Pomfrey. "And now, I'm afraid, you've been here long enough. He needs his rest if he wants to heal these wounds of his. Out! All of you." They said their goodbyes to Lupin and left the Hospital Wing. When they reached the Entrance Hall, Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny split off from the others and made their way back to Gryffindor Tower in silence. Harry couldn't get over the unfairness of it all. Lupin had never done anything to hurt anyone. He was probably one of the kindest men Harry had ever known and yet he was going to have to live in the forest as if he were some kind of beast, just because of an affliction he couldn't control. With a start, he realized that they were standing outside of the entrance to Gryffindor Tower; he hadn't even been paying attention to where they were as he walked. Hermione gave the Fat Lady the summer password ('Silent Lucidity') and stepped into the common room followed by Ginny. Harry made to go along with them, but Ron's hand pulled him back sharply. "I need to talk to you, Harry. This shouldn't take too long." "What's up?" asked Harry. "Is it about Lupin?" "No," said Ron, walking away from the open portal and turning the corner so they were well out of earshot of Ginny and Hermione. "It's about Hermione." "Hermione? What's wrong with her?" Harry asked. "Nothing's wrong with her, Harry. She's the cleverest witch in our year, she's beautiful, she's kind...and she takes an awful lot of shite from you." "What are on about?" Harry asked. "She came to me in tears this afternoon, mate," said Ron, fixing him with a glare. "Oh, that," said Harry scornfully. "I'm not a good friend to her if I don't declare Kreacher a saint, is that it?" Ron grabbed him by both lapels and hauled him forward, raising him slightly off the ground. Harry was so shocked that he didn't even react at first. "She was going to bloody apologise to you for being wrong about Kreacher," Ron hissed. He let go of Harry, spun on his heel and stormed off, leaving Harry standing alone in shock. * Many hours later, Harry lay awake in bed. He hadn't yet been able to talk to Hermione about his outburst, especially since Ginny was right with them. She, Hermione, had acted as if nothing were wrong when they were at dinner, but Harry didn't know if that meant anything one way or the other; girls were so confusing sometimes. Harry glanced at the clock and saw that it was 3:30 in the morning. He didn't reckon he would be getting to sleep tonight. By quarter of four, he stopped trying at all. He pulled the coverings of his four-poster open and quietly slipped out of the room, closing the door behind him. He softly padded down the stairs and into the dark common room. He saw movement in the darkness by the unlit fireplace and stopped suddenly, dropping into a crouch and reaching for his wand. With a start, he realized that he'd left it upstairs on his bedside table. There came the sound of liquid being poured into a glass. "Who's there?" Harry asked tentatively. "Harry?" Ginny's voice was slurred and sounded tired. When Harry moved closer he could smell the alcohol in the air. "Ginny, have you been drinking?" "Yeah. I had a nightmare... a bad one." "That isn't butterbeer," said Harry, taking the seat opposite her at the hearth. "Damn right it isn't," said Ginny. Harry picked up the bottle and squinted to read it in the darkness: Ogden's Old Fire Whiskey. "Do you want to talk about it?" Harry asked. "The whiskey?" Ginny asked, half-giggling. "No, your nightmare," said Harry. "Not really. Couple shots of this and -hic- it doesn't seem so bad any more." "And how many shots have you had?" Harry asked. "Thr-f... eh, I don't remember, Harry." "You've had enough," said Harry, pulling the glass away from her. "Where'd you get it anyway?" "Pfft. I've been st-stas...I've kept some in my trunk ever since Dad got bit." Harry didn't know what to say. It wasn't like he had a problem with drinking, and if the whiskey helped with Ginny's nightmares, he wasn't about to take it away from her. But Ginny was a small girl, and he reckoned she'd probably had four or five glasses tonight. "Listen...d'you...d'you mind if I keep this in my trunk? I won't drink it, I just want you to talk to me before you start drinking it...y'know, just in case..." "Oh, fu...fu...just no, Harry. It's my effing whiskey. I can drink it if I want." "Not if you're going to drink too much," said Harry. Ginny stood unsteadily on her feet. "Don't you t-tell me-whoa!" Harry leapt forward and caught Ginny as she fell. "Easy, love." Ginny giggled. "Thanks, Harry. I just..." "Am too drunk to walk," Harry finished for her. "Yes. That." Harry helped Ginny over to the sofa and sat down with her. Ginny looked away from him and mumbled something he couldn't make out. Harry gently put his hand to her face and turned her to look at him; he was startled to see tears in her eyes; Ginny almost never cried. He wrapped his arms around her and held her to his chest, murmuring soothing words until she calmed. Within minutes they were both asleep.
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