Outline · [ Standard ] · Linear+ Situation at Work

[Malchior]

Ok, this will be entirely from my point of view as that is the only one I have available. First, some history.

I have always been a very 'huggy' person, I love giving, and receiving hugs. I've been told on a regular basis and repeatedly (by both male and female persons) that I give excellent hugs. There have been people who stopped by work just to get a hug from me. I'd sooner hug you than shake your hand.

Now, it's well established at work (I work at McDonald's by the way) that I give hugs to everyone. New people are told on the first day that I give hugs. Anyway, there is a girl, whom we shall name Fate, that I have hugged dozens of times before, she's given me hugs dozens of times too. Now the other day, she walked out of work after I gave her a hug. Later on, I heard through another employee in drive-through that a friend of Fate's told him that Fate was telling people I was sexually harassing her. This came as a shock to everyone because it's just so random. Now, the next day, when I came to work, Fate had not shown up to work, nor had she called in to say why she wasn't showing up. The Senior Manager, we shall name him Bob, called me into the office. Bob told me that Fate talked to him and, while she never claimed sexual harassment to him, said I made her uncomfortable. Now, the McDonald's I work at is ripe with adult humor, be it innuendo, jokes, snappy come-backs etc. and I'm one of the most frequent harvesters. Bob told me that if I hugged anyone, touched them inappropriately, told any adult jokes, or did anything of a sexual nature, I'd be fired if he found out about it.

This offended me. Not only was I not allowed to give hugs (which is a crime in my opinion), but he was being a hypocrite in that each and every manager could be accused of the same so-called sexual acts that I could, on a daily basis. When I pointed out how many of those acts occur at work, he said "Well, you're the only one who has a complaint, so you can't do it." He singled me out, and implied I'm the only one who will be punished, then, when we left the office, we walked right by someone performing a 'sexual act' and I looked at him and he completely ignored it, thus lending credence to my assumption. As the day went by, more acts were performed, and no one got in trouble over it. So when I got off work that day, I put in my two week notice. I won't work for hypocrites, and the rest of the managers I told agreed (so have the other employees) that what Bob did was wrong. I love working at my job, it's a blast and the people there I count amongst my friends, but I feel I have been wronged so I am ending my employment there, at least for now.

I've talked to a few people about this, and I've been given a couple of ideas on what to do now. Some of the ideas are just getting a different job and ignoring it; I could talk to the owners about it; I could write to my newspaper with my story and bring bad publicity to McDonald's in my town; I've already let Bob know how I feel; and I obviously can't continue working there right now, not with the threat of being fired for sexual harassment if I want to become a teacher.

I don't know what to do at this point, and I'm looking for more advice. Can anyone spare some?

[Kelleypen]

While Fate was unfair and so was Bob, not everyone is comfortable with hugging. Especially from an older generation. I am not comfortable with being hugged by anyone other than my family and my very closest friends. Yet I work in a high school and am seen by many students as a mom figure, so I let them hug me. I know they need it more than I need to keep my space. Please be aware that even though someone may allow you to hug them, it might make them very uncomfortable.

Fate should have spoken to you privately, and Bob should have left it alone. But what is done is done. Find another job and decide that you are going to be a bigger person than they are and not sink to their level.

[Malchior]

Well, Fate came up and give me hugs without me asking, so I don't think it was that.

Anyway, the situation has been dealt with, I ended up talking to a lawyer about the legality of this and he told me what Bob did was wrong, so I sat down with the owners and explained my story and while I was doing my own thing, I guess the other employees and managers were not happy with my leaving and forced Bob to come apologize to me. I'm no longer quitting, but things at work are very different now.