angelmorph
Wednesday 7th October 2015 10:18 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
The Petunia/Severus interaction in this chapter was excellent. I particularly enjoyed:
- the way she didn't recognise him at first
- the lines “I’m not going anywhere with you,” Petunia spat, trembling. “So be it. I can at least tell Lily that I tried,” he said before turning away and moving back toward the open door. She stared blankly at his retreating back. “You’re just going to leave?” Petunia asked, stunned. Snape stopped, glancing back over his shoulder. “I’m certainly not going to waste my time arguing with you. If you don’t care what happens to your son, what concern is it of mine?”
- Petunia sussing out Snape's motives
- their shared dislike for Harry
I also particularly enjoyed the contrast between Harry and Dudley's present, as well as the depth of Dudley's thought process, that he's starting to realize that his mum's idea of his best interests conflict with his actual best interests... |
gymnastgal19
Saturday 10th January 2009 16:22 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
haha i was wondering who the 4rd ghost would be... guess its snape
i love the two different scenes! |
GhostWriter
Wednesday 7th January 2009 11:57 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Another great chapter. How sweet, the moments w/ & !
I really loved the interaction between Snape and Petunia. I loved his manipulation of the conversation. You certainly captured him well. |
lantis222
Monday 29th December 2008 09:48 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| Loved it! On to the next chapter! |
majolie
Friday 26th December 2008 19:02 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| I love your Snape ... unwillingly doing his part to bring Petunia to her senses, or what amounts to them. Plus, I really enjoyed the peek at Harry's Christmas joy. |
hank
Friday 26th December 2008 10:13 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| Excellent job with Snape! It's interesting to see how the story isn't going exactly according to Lily's plan (or was it someone else's plan?). Too cool! I can't wait to see what happens next! |
rhetor
Friday 26th December 2008 08:48 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Merry Christmas, Melinda!
I know (or I gather, anyway, based on your replies to my earlier comments) that you're not attempting a deep Dickens Commentary here, but I can't help seeing all the comparisons.
The choice of assigning dead persons to be the spirits of Christmas Past and Christmas Present really changes the dynamic. In Dickens, the three "Tenses" are all rather abstracted, which allows them to stand in for God Himself but also depersonalizes them somewhat. None of them, for example, displays anything like the intensity of feeling that Marley splashes onto the page. (The one really dramatic bit of feeling I remember from any of the three was in the 1984 television (Clive Donner / George C. Scott) production, in which Edward Woodward, as XPresent, delivers the line "It may be that, in the sight of Heaven, you are more miserable and less fit to live than millions like this poor man's child" -- he said it with such unexpected force that you just knew he was emodying the Wrath of God.)
But by choosing Lily and Snape to fill these roles, you've given the whole matter a personal dimension. The best aspect of it, in this chapter, is Snape's clear reluctance to be in this role in the first place, and the palpable contempt he has for Harry even as he holds him up as an example of what a man happy in love can be. Better than that, even, is how you make his hatred of James/Harry inspire Petunia, of all people, to defend James -- and consequently to reconsider her feelings about Harry. And you do it without giving her any change of heart -- she simply wants to one-up Snape in the conversation. ... which is exactly the way Scrooge is behaving in Stave Three. Brilliant.
Of course we mushy H-G fans are just going "Aww" at the Xmas scene, but it isn't anything we didn't expect. What's unexpected is that Petunia may begin to get just a glimmer of what she's done to Dudley.
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rhetor
Thursday 25th December 2008 18:13 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Merry Christmas, Melinda!
I know (or I gather, anyway, based on your replies to my earlier comments) that you're not attempting a deep Dickens Commentary here, but I can't help seeing all the comparisons.
The choice of assigning dead persons to be the spirits of Christmas Past and Christmas Present really changes the dynamic. In Dickens, the three "Tenses" are all rather abstracted, which allows them to stand in for God Himself but also depersonalizes them somewhat. None of them, for example, displays anything like the intensity of feeling that Marley splashes onto the page. (The one really dramatic bit of feeling I remember from any of the three was in the 1984 television (Clive Donner / George C. Scott) production, in which Edward Woodward, as XPresent, delivers the line "It may be that, in the sight of Heaven, you are more miserable and less fit to live than millions like this poor man's child" -- he said it with such unexpected force that you just knew he was emodying the Wrath of God.)
But by choosing Lily and Snape to fill these roles, you've given the whole matter a personal dimension. The best aspect of it, in this chapter, is Snape's clear reluctance to be in this role in the first place, and the palpable contempt he has for Harry even as he holds him up as an example of what a man happy in love can be. Better than that, even, is how you make his hatred of James/Harry inspire Petunia, of all people, to defend James -- and consequently to reconsider her feelings about Harry. And you do it without giving her any change of heart -- she simply wants to one-up Snape in the conversation. ... which is exactly the way Scrooge is behaving in Stave Three. Brilliant.
Of course we mushy H-G fans are just going "Aww" at the Xmas scene, but it isn't anything we didn't expect. What's unexpected is that Petunia may begin to get just a glimmer of what she's done to Dudley.
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PhoenixFeathers
Thursday 25th December 2008 17:07 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| oh, come on! as the ghost of christmas present? what's next, the basilisc as the ghost of christmas future? or voldemort?! |
TheKiD
Thursday 25th December 2008 15:49 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
I can't believe that this is the first time I ever review one of your stories. Shame to me, but I only got to read your stories in 2007, and it didn't seem too right to review them after you had already completed them... but, I must 'confess' that I have read PoE & CoTD 9 times each and TSH 6 times *blush* - so yeah, I guess you can see that I love them. Congratulations are in order for them, wish I had discovered them back in 2004 and 2005 when they weren't finished yet.
Now, as to this 5-chapter story... amazingly well-done, as always. Can't expect something else from you anyway, only 5-stars work. I can't wait to see what you're going to come up with for the next chapter, the 'future' one.
Someone who will always be your fan. |
Amamama
Thursday 25th December 2008 11:01 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Woot! I'm not sure I hoped his greasiness would be here, but he surely (or should that be surly?) fits. He's doing a great job as a ghost. I think I prefer him as that. And Ron - spot on! Just as addicted to food as always. Now, I'm waiting for the Ghost of Future Christmases (or whatever). Who's that? *grinning in anticipation*
Thanks a bunch, Melinda! As wonderful as always! And Happy Holiday! |
aharkins
Wednesday 24th December 2008 16:35 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
You did a great job on Snape. But then, you do a great job on anything you write. You've almost got me feeling sorry for Dudley. Thanks for sharing your talent. Hope you have a very merry Christmas.
... |
Kezzabear
Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:15 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
You totally did Snape justice. I loved every bit of him!
Well ... you know ... in the only way I can love Snape ... like not much ... |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:36 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Aww, thanks, Kezza! I think you and I feel the same way about . Hee. Still, I did have fun with him in this one. |
cutgril
Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:03 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| This story is great. I am looking forward to the next chapter! Glad you are writing again. |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:35 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! I'm glad to be writing, too. Chirstmas Future is in the line up! |
yiota
Wednesday 24th December 2008 08:30 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
You know, I expected James to be the Ghost of Christmas Present, I think Snape's surliness would suit Christmas Future better. I hope Petunia is learning something from this.
Happy Christmas to you! |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:34 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks, and Merry Christmas to you, too. I considered long and hard over the order of the ghosts. Snape is doing this for Lily, but he doesn't really care about the outcome. For the Future, I needed someone with more of a stake in what happened in the past. I hope you'll enjoy how it plays out. |
Grandma Kate
Wednesday 24th December 2008 08:29 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Oh Melinda! This is so much fun to read.
This is such an insightful sentence-
“Allow me to reintroduce myself. I am Severus Snape, the Ghost of Christmas Present,” he said, his lips twisting as if the words left a sour taste in his mouth.
Snape is such an unwilling ghost. I think you have captured both him and Petunia well-
“The savior arrives,” Snape muttered dryly under his breath.
Petunia glanced at him, reading his total distaste for the situation and his unmasked disdain for her nephew. She began to feel the first affinity for the man since his arrival. |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:33 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
Thanks! I had fun with this - can't you just see Snape and Peunia together? Now, I'd never condone infidelity, but in another universe...
Their interaction just sort of wrote itself. |
oliversgal
Wednesday 24th December 2008 06:52 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
I think Snape was a wonderful Christmas present. I thought maybe James but what connection did he have to Petunia. It is interesting to see Dudley and Harry at similar points during their lives. In love but the contrast of being able to express it and having to keep it a secret.
I particularly liked the imagery you created at Smeltings. I found that this setting was similar to one memory from Scrooges past but it fit perfectly with the plot of Petunia's Christmas present.
If I may speculate, I think the Ghost of Christmas future will be Dumbledore. I think Voldemort would portray the images of the grim reaper better but I believe that any return even in a dream would not be a good thing. Anyway, I think her future will show her alone, Vernon would be dead and Dudley possibly disowning her to be with Deidre.
As always this was a great chapter. How many more chapters are you planning? |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:31 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! There are two more chapters still to come, and Future is a bit different than in the Dicken's tale since it's Dudley's salvation rather than Petunia's that we're aiming for. I hope you like my choice. |
hjdevnull
Wednesday 24th December 2008 06:31 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
My judge of doing Snape justice is if I can mentally hear his lines said by Alan Rickman, and I certainly can here. Especially the part where he wrests control back from Petunia near the end with just two simple lines.
Great story so far. I wonder who's going to be the ghost of future? |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:28 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! That's how I judge Snape, too, lol. I don't even like Snape, but I adore the way Alan Rickman plays him. I've submitted the Future chapter, so hopefully it won't be long. |
mmerriam
Wednesday 24th December 2008 06:28 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| It's good to see you back here and writing again! You have always been one of my favorite HP fan-writers, and I'm loving this fic so much! |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:27 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thank you! It's good to be back again. It's so nice to get feedback as you write. Original work is lonely, lol. I'm glad you're enjoying the story. |
Patches
Wednesday 24th December 2008 05:30 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| This is very well done. I am so glad you chose Snape to be the ghost of Christmas Present. He was perfect. He hated James and it shows. Petunia even figured out that Snape is jealous of James and she also realized when Snape pointed it out that Harry is extremely happy and Dudley is obviously not. Something she cannot understand. No wonder she went back to bed and cried. She has good reason to even though she still doesn't have the whole picture. I look forward to the rest of this story. p |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:26 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! It was fun to use Snape as I don't usually - he's so mean! Still, I really liked the interaction that developed between him and Petunia. If she and Vernon ever split, I think I'd ship Snape and Petunia, lol. |
harald
Wednesday 24th December 2008 01:35 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
| Like it a lot, no big preachings, just come and see the difference... looking forward to the future christmas! |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:24 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! I'm not trying to be preachy, so I'm glad you don't feel it's coming across that way. |
dragyn
Tuesday 23rd December 2008 23:37 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Wow. A stunning retelling of a classic using a modern classic. Your characterizations so far are spot on (and that includes Snape.) And it was quite fun in this chapter looking in on the Weasleys+Harry from both an outsider's view and with Snape's jelousy.
I look forward to seeing the rest of this. Keep it up |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:23 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Thanks! I had a lot of fun with this story, and it did my heart good to get to write Harry so happy. |
Ocean Dream
Tuesday 23rd December 2008 18:58 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
What a great choice! Actually, I had a rather heated discussion yesterday about Snape liking/hating Harry and your story supports my arguments very nicely, thanks! I don't like Snape either, he's so un-likable, Jo made a good job on him and you kept the high level!
So well written, I'd read it on and on.
I absolutely loved the Burrow scenes (just missed Hermione a bit, how come she wasn't there?) and the moment Petunia said James wasn't arrogant, yes!
Brilliant story, can't wait next part.
Good luck and merry Christmas! |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:22 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| Ooh, and the Great Snape Debate still rages. I love it! One of my pre-betas missed Hermione, too - but I was thinking of this as the first Christmas after the battle when Ginny and Hermione come home from Hogwarts. Hermione usually goes to her own parents first - and after all their time away, well... |
Wolf\\\'s Scream
Tuesday 23rd December 2008 18:20 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol |
Well, I think you did Snape justice. :-)
I was mildly surprised that the conversation between Dudley & Deidre was devoid of something that would have undoubtedly shocked Petunia to the core, such as what to do about the child that Deidre is carrying. I suppose you wanted to be a tad more subtle, which is why you're a writer (and I'm not). ;-} |
| Wednesday 24th December 2008 10:18 | A Potterverse Christmas Carol (Author Response) |
| *blinks* Baby? You do know this is only a 5 chapter story, right? |
