Dad
Thursday 12th June 2014 09:04 | Vis Insita | I read this last week and was a bit confused. I re-read it today from two chapters back and found out I had missed the last chapter. Undoubtedly getting senile, though I do not check this site often enough because it gets so little traffic.
Any way, I suggest you send them "up north", (say that with a Lancashire accent). If they pass by Bolton, my younger self will buy Scott a pint. | | Wednesday 18th June 2014 03:28 | Vis Insita (Author Response) | | I can't look those locations up right now, but you can let me know where Scott is in relation to you in an upcoming chapter. | dun8y
Tuesday 10th June 2014 12:47 | Vis Insita | It seems to me that the story is going to have to go somewhere soon, otherwise it'll become a bit like the original book and just have lots of words with nothing much happening. Thank you for writing, my only problem is that I've caught up with you! Ah well, I can do waiting quite well, as long as it's not too long please.
Thank you, Sue x | | Wednesday 18th June 2014 03:05 | Vis Insita (Author Response) | It seems to me that the story is going to have to go somewhere soon, otherwise it'll become a bit like the original book and just have lots of words with nothing much happening.
Such is the nature of my decompressed approach to character interacting and my devotion to logic above induced drama. And I don't think a comparison to the book is all bad, really. It's my basis, after all.
Thank you for writing, my only problem is that I've caught up with you! Ah well, I can do waiting quite well, as long as it's not too long please.
Yes, hopefully not too long. | The Pharaoh
Thursday 5th June 2014 21:07 | Vis Insita | I'm glad to see you're definitely moving ahead with this, if the recent update pace is indicative.
There were a couple typos I noticed, and I'll point them out because there usually aren't any and so either 1) you care about not having typos and will appreciate it, or 2) you don't care, but regardless I hold you to a higher standard than I do most fanfic authors. In the opening quoted passage, it says "Observation may be required determine if they are..." instead of "required to determine," and when Hermione's scolding Scott she says, "if I ever hear the two of you says things like that to each other again," where it should be "the two of you say things like that".
Anywho, content-wise... Ginny said she didn't want to talk about the Diary, but everything she was saying to Scott and thinking to herself was integrally about the Diary. Then, perhaps it was just his being clouded by anger, but Harry seemed remarkably lacking in empathy in the morning bedroom conversation up until he finally turned completely around, even though he told himself he was very aware of Ginny's feelings.
I was relieved when someone finally phrased it as, "the risks greatly outweigh the rewards," because that occurred to me right away as the best way to put it and it was frustrating that no one had said it.
I feel like I should be satisfied by the chapter length when I look at the scroll bar on the page and see how long it is, but it felt like almost nothing actually happened; about half the chapter was internal monologue, it seems like. | | Thursday 5th June 2014 21:42 | Vis Insita (Author Response) | "There were a couple typos I noticed, and I'll point them out because there usually aren't any and so either 1) you care about not having typos and will appreciate it, or 2) you don't care, but regardless I hold you to a higher standard than I do most fanfic authors."
Little things do sometimes slip past myself and Sherry (I've certainly read more than a few published books with typos). I fixed those myself elsewhere, so thanks for the heads up, but only Sherry can do it here.
"Anywho, content-wise... Ginny said she didn't want to talk about the Diary, but everything she was saying to Scott and thinking to herself was integrally about the Diary."
I'm not sure I understand your objection. Her internal monologue and the emotions of her reaction were entirely about the Diary, yes. The events of her first year were central to her state when confronting Scott. But I was of the opinion that she would not want to discuss the events surrounding the Diary with Scott. It was personal, and he wasn't there, and she isn't all that close to him, not close enough to talk about the Diary, for sure. When Scott mentions the Diary, she quickly shuts him down.
Her stance on the matter is motivated by the Diary, yes, and they both know that (or, at least, Scott suspects, even if he doesn't know the fully story). But she'll be damned if she talks about it with Scott or allows him to claim she's biased because of it. That's none of his business, from her standpoint.
"Then, perhaps it was just his being clouded by anger, but Harry seemed remarkably lacking in empathy in the morning bedroom conversation up until he finally turned completely around, even though he told himself he was very aware of Ginny's feelings. "
I would argue that empathy is not one of Harry's primary attributes. He demonstrates remarkable insensitivity at various points throughout the books, most especially towards Cho. He ignored Ginny for years, despite her obvious attraction.
And, yes, he was very angry that what he saw as a potential shortcut to victory was being blocked by his companions at every turn. As is often the case with him, he did not consider the risks before he decided.
"I was relieved when someone finally phrased it as, "the risks greatly outweigh the rewards," because that occurred to me right away as the best way to put it and it was frustrating that no one had said it."
Well, the ultimate possible endpoint was swift victory. Many people in history have risked everything for that same, elusive reward. Harry's friends were unwilling to be risked, not that he really thought about them before deciding that losing the curse link was bad. You'll notice at the end of the chapter, out of all Harry's companions, Scott was the most willing to consider the benefits. But he's too practical to not see the odds were unfavorable to the point it couldn't be worth it.
"I feel like I should be satisfied by the chapter length when I look at the scroll bar on the page and see how long it is, but it felt like almost nothing actually happened; about half the chapter was internal monologue, it seems like."
Fair enough, though I must remind you this story, and its predecessor, have never been anything but extremely decompressed. I don't think this can be considered anything but par for the course.
This chapter is actually an endgame, but it's for a game that no one noticed. Not a single person commented during That Terrifying Momentum about Harry's lack of scar pain and visions. But, nearly 200,000 words after the end of sixth year, here is the explanation. It was a thread I left dangling, perhaps in the unconscious hope someone would notice. On the writing side of things, I just never found an organic place for it. I finally arrived at that place this chapter. I think it's a necessary closing of an open question, and a confrontation that was a long time in coming. |
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