Uncle Vernon was sitting at the steering wheel of his new company car. He was currently stuck in a motorway traffic jam as they he and his passengers had been for the last forty five minutes, fuming that once again his "good for nothing" aberration of a nephew was making him waste another day picking him up from that… that… place. Uncle Vernon did not like to think of it as a school; a proper school was a place like Smeltings, his old school and the place where his own son, Dudley, now went.
"And just look how he is turning out," he said aloud, thumping the steering wheel. "Perfect example of a proper education!"
"What's that, dear?" Asked Aunt Petunia, who had not been paying attention to her husband. She had been lost in her own thoughts about the upcoming summer: thoughts that reminded her of similar journeys, some twenty odd years ago, to pick up her sister. Lily, her younger sister who, until the events of last summer, she had tried very hard to forget. Now with the imminent return of her damn nephew she was finding hard to put those memories where they belonged, or even better to forget them altogether.
"I was just saying what a proper school can do. I mean, look at what a fine young man our Dudley is turning out to be." At this Dudley's eyes raised slightly from magazine he was reading, then he returned back to his article with a small smirk on his podgy face.
"Silly pillock still has no idea has he?" he muttered just under his breath.
Not hearing him, Uncle Dursley was rising to one of his favourite pastimes, namely ways to make that boy's life hell. If he was going to have to have the ungrateful brat in his house, he was going to make sure that it was going to be as unpleasant as possible for him. Which everybody knew, was the only way to control brats like his nephew, and with a bit of luck it might even knock the boy's abnormalites out of him.
"Rules! That's what that boy needs! We have let him have too much leeway in the past… but not this time. This year that blasted boy will learn to do as he is told, so help me. DO AS HE IS TOLD!". These last words were bellowed at the top of his voice and accompanied by a particularly loud PAAAARRRRRPPPP! as he caught the horn, which not only made Dudley drop his magazine in shock but also made the drivers of all the surrounding cars spin their heads round to see what was happening. Dudley seized the opportunity to make obscene gestures at them with his hand.
"VERNON! Stop drawing attention to yourself and let's talk about the boy." At this, Dudley stopped attempting to reach down and pick back up his magazine and sat back, eager to put forward some ideas of his own. Petunia had evidently noticed this as she turned her head round carefully, taking the utmost care not to dislodge her expensive new hat. "Don't you worry yourself about him, Duddikins. We won't let him hurt you this year, will we Daddy?"
"No, we most certainly will not," he huffed. "That boy will not be able to do a thing this summer with out my permission!"
"Oh, goodie!" replied Dudley, rubbing his hands together and grinning.
As he said that, the traffic started to move again and the three Dursley's spent the rest of the journey deciding the rules that Harry Potter was going to have to abide by this summer.
A/N1: Thanks to Imogen, Pooca & LadyChi for the Beta work.
A/N2: Well I never thought I'd ever be writing one of these, but thanks to Imogen (Beta: Not my fault at all. I deny everything. Absolutely!) I rather stupidly entered this years NaNoWriMo and commited myself to writing a 50,000 word novel in a month (November 2003) and yes I do mean 50,000 words in 30 days and this being my first attempt at writing anything as well!, Told you I was stupid :) This is the result of that endeavor, well the result after being edited beyond all recognition anyway.