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Author: Fionnabhair Story: A Lost Generation Rating: Teens Setting: Pre-OotP Status: Completed Reviews: 5 Words: 101,912
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter; nor have I ever earned money from Harry Potter. I do this purely for my own satisfaction. “Sirius! Wait!” Lily trotted after him, trying to ignore the stitch in her side, but he didn’t stop until she was completely out of breath. When he finally did his face was dark with fury. “Look, Evans, unless it’s important …” Momentarily discomfited she reached out a hand to touch his forearm, and said, “What’s wrong?” His eyes flashed as he said, “Well, I broke up with Veronica and my idiot brother just tried to curse me.” “Oh – I’m sorry. Are you okay?” He waved a hand dismissively. “I’m fine. He may have sprouted tentacles.” She couldn’t help herself. “Well, it’s not all bad. Maybe you can find a girl with actual brains to go out with you.” The look on his face was so odd she took half a step backwards – he had been in a funny mood lately. Sirius sighed and said, “All right Head Girl, what is it?” She bit her lip. “It’s about James – I’m worried about him.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and gave her a measuring look. “Why?” She hugged herself and said, “It’s … ever since his father died – he doesn’t talk much, he’s playing Quidditch like a maniac, I saw that thing he did with the Bludger you know, and I don’t know if I’m helping or making it worse … and don’t think I didn’t notice that you’re nearly as bad …” Her voice trailed off, and she stared determinedly into the space beyond his right shoulder. Sirius’ voice was surprisingly gentle when he said, “You’ve never lost anyone have you?” She shook her head. “No. All my grandparents died before I was born so … but I was there for Dorcas, and she … she talked about it.” “Yeah, but that wasn’t the same. That was … sudden. James’ dad had been sick for a really long time. He knew this was coming.” “It’s not fair.” Lily sniffed and continued. “But that’s not … could you talk to him? Just so he’ll stop killing himself.” “Why don’t you?” She struggled for words. “I think it’d just be better coming from you. You know him better than anyone – I’m just the girlfriend.” Sirius looked mildly surprised and said, “I’ll talk to him. But you are helping, you know – you’re the one he wants to sit with.” She smiled at him. “Thanks, Sirius.” He looked as though he might say something when they were interrupted by Dorcas yelling, “Lily!” She came running down the street, her scarf and hair flying out behind her. Her cheeks were glowing and her eyes sparkled, and from his sharp intake of breath, Lily could tell Sirius had noticed. Dorcas skidded to a halt in front of them, flushing lightly when Sirius touched her upper arm to steady her. “Sorry,” she said, “The queue in Scrivenshaft’s was unbelievable. Are you ready to go to the Three Broomsticks?” Lily grinned. “Of course,” she said. “Will you join us, Sirius?” With an overly casual air, he said, “Yeah sure. I think James and Peter are there.” They linked arms with him as they walked through the streets, and Dorcas asked, “Where’s Remus?” Sirius scowled. “I don’t know, he’s gone off somewhere.” As they walked past the Post Office, Lily saw the owl with the Easter eggs for her parents taking off. She devoutly hoped that it wouldn’t aggravate Petunia too much; though Lily doubted she would ever suspend her hatred of magic so far as to actually taste the chocolate. When they reached the pub Lily, dropped Sirius’ arm and broke into a run. After a moment Dorcas followed her, and they both accosted the tall, dark-haired girl lingering outside. “Marlene!” The three girls formed a huddle, hugging and giggling, and they were too excited to separate until a tall, cheerful looking man said, “Are we going in then?” Marlene broke away, saying, “Sorry, Dermot, I know it’s been ages – what were you two doing – anyway, you know Lily, and this is Dorcas.” They shook hands. “And Sirius. This is Dermot O’Hare.” Sirius did a double take at that and said, “From Nimbus!” Lily rolled her eyes. “Get used to it, Dermot – this lot will be asking for your autograph next.” He grinned. “Well, in that case, let’s get right to it.” He held the door open for them and as she walked in, Lily saw James sitting in the corner with Peter, looking morose. He smiled when he saw her and Lily hurried over to sit beside him, slipping her hand into his as she sat. He nodded to the others and said hello to Marlene. When she introduced Dermot, his response was the predictable, “From Nimbus,” with an additional “Do you know Devlin Whitehorn?” Lily would have laughed, but it was the first time she had seen him look truly animated in weeks. As James, Sirius and Dermot began a Quidditch conversation, Lily leaned towards Marlene and said, “So, how come you didn’t write to us, or anything – not that I’m not glad to see you.” Marlene blushed and bit her lip; Dorcas and Lily exchanged significant looks. They couldn’t ever remember her behaving like this. Slowly she slid her left hand across the table. There was something glittering. Lily was so surprised she said – no shouted, “You’re getting married!” Marlene winced. “Thanks, Lily. Guess that’s everyone told.” James laughed. “I don’t know, I’m not sure Madam Rosmerta heard – want me to go tell her?” Lily looked at him sharply. “And why would you want to do that?” He sat back, grinning disarmingly. “No reason at all – I already have the perfect girlfriend. She’s just a pleasant woman who sells Butterbeer.” There was a loud groan around the table, but Lily leaned back to kiss him on the cheek, saying, “That’s a very good answer.” Marlene laughed out loud. “I can’t believe you finally wore her down, James.” Dermot looked confused and asked, “Why?” Marlene looked at him affectionately. “You see, this is the girl who, at the end of her fifth year, stomped up to the dorm, said she hated him with the fire of a thousand suns, and punched a hole in the wall.” Peter and Sirius gasped out loud and James said, “I annoyed you that much?” Lily squirmed and said, “You … might have.” Sirius grinned. “And you punched a hole in the wall.” Dorcas laughed. “She made herself bleed.” “Hey! Dorcas, you keep this up, and some of your stories are going to come out … like that time … in Paris.” Dorcas shook her head fervently. “My lips are sealed.” Sirius stared at her intently. “Come on,” he said, “how many deep, dark secrets can you two have?” Lily didn’t like the direction this was taking, but Dorcas had it covered. “I’ll never tell.” Sirius stretched out a hand to caress her cheek and said, “Not even under torture?” Everyone was by now completely silent, and Dorcas had flushed the colour of a strawberry. She seemed to stiffen suddenly and she pulled away from him. “How’s Veronica?” she said tartly. “I wouldn’t know. She hasn’t spoken to me in a week … Care to take her place, Meadows?” Marlene winced and glanced at Lily. It came as no surprise to either of them when Dorcas stood up, flipped her hair over her shoulder, and said, “I have to go. I promised Gaspard I’d help him buy a present for his sister. Sorry your girlfriend dumped you, Sirius.” And with that, and a slam of the door, she was gone. Marlene and Lily groaned, and Sirius sat back, looking as though he’d been hit over the head with a bat. Dermot let out a low whistle and said, “How long has that been going on?” Lily sighed. “About a year now.” Sirius looked at her sharply. “No, it hasn’t!” “Yes it has – ever since you became Potions partners.” “Those were just creative differences.” Marlene leaned over the table and patted Sirius on the cheek. “You know,” she said, “for a smart boy, you really don’t know anything about women.” It was clear she’d hit a nerve, for Sirius sat back and said indignantly, “I’ve had lots of girlfriends.” James nodded. “It’s true.” “All the girls like Sirius,” Peter added. Lily sighed, and Marlene said, “Look, if you actually fancy a girl, you shouldn’t ask her out like a piece of meat. She has her pride you know. You have to woo her.” Lily nodded, and said, “Honestly, I’d thought you’d have learned something from watching James mess it up for six years.” James was momentarily roused from his torpor. “Hey, it worked in the end didn’t it?” Lily smiled at him affectionately. “Yes, but I’m much less stubborn than she is. And you didn’t ask me out the day you broke up with your ex-girlfriend. Well, you did, but it was a joke.” “No, it wasn’t.” Lily raised an eyebrow. “Then you should be glad I thought it was, ‘cause it’s pretty insulting.” Sirius snapped his fingers in front of her. “If you two are finished?” Lily blushed, but said, “Look it’s not like you haven’t got competition. I mean … Gaspard …” “Gaspard asked her out?” “A lot.” Sirius sounded outraged. “What’s he doing asking her out when I want to ask her out?” But he was not to be deterred. “How long has he liked her?” Lily shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know – a long time. She only likes him as a friend, but who knows – in time …” When he sat back in high dudgeon, Lily winked at Peter and James, before continuing, “And you know Gaspard’s smart and sensitive … and he always opens the door.” “All right, all right, I get the point.” A general silence fell as Sirius’ sulky face threw a pall over the table. It was only broken when Dermot slapped his forehead and said, “I was supposed to watch Dorcas fly today.” Peter looked interested. “How come?” he said. “We need to hire a test flier, a female one, and Marlene said she was pretty good.” Peter’s voice piped up again. “Why does it have to be a girl?” “Well, see, it’s a bit harder to design a broom that’ll work for women; the steering has to be a bit more responsive, you know.” When Peter looked confused, Dermot flexed a bicep jokingly. “Upper body strength. It’s not as easy for them to wrestle a broom into submission. You’d know all about that, wouldn’t you, Lily?” She glared at him and was about to retort when something heavy collided with the top of her head. She took a moment to recover, having been knocked forward by the impact. As she righted herself she heard the door crash behind her and saw James glaring in that direction. He put a hand to her head tenderly and asked, “Are you all right?” She smiled. “I’m fine. Just a bit dazed.” Sirius’ voice was angry. “He did that on purpose.” “Who?” Lily asked. A look of distaste twisted Marlene’s face as she said, “Snape.” “Oh. I probably should have expected something like that – after Wilkes and Rosier.” Peter’s usually warm face seemed clenched with anxiety as he said, “You shouldn’t have done it – you have made an enemy of him, Lily.” James scoffed. “That’s pathetic – they’re back now anyway. And they deserved it.” He seemed more than usually angry, and Lily touched his arm gently, saying, “He was always going to hate me anyway. I’m a ‘Mudblood,’ remember?” In response to the shocked silence that greeted her little speech, she said, “Look, it’s just a word. If I let myself get upset every time – it’s what’s behind it that matters.” Sirius goggled at her and Lily decided to change the subject. “Anyway, you should come for the match next week instead, Dermot. Then you’ll be able to see her play against another team, instead of on her own.” Marlene leaned forward, cutting off his response as she said, “So, have you figured out what you’re going to do yet?” Lily shook her head, raising her hands in bemused resignation. “I haven’t a clue.” In a tone reminiscent of Professor McGonagall, she added, “It’s very serious you know, Miss McKinnon, that a witch of my age should have no purpose or direction in life.” Marlene laughed and said, “And what about you lot?” Sirius slapped James’ shoulder, saying, “We’re going to be Aurors.” “That is, if you get the marks,” Lily said tartly, trying to ignore the surge of fear in her belly. “And how about you, Peter?” Dermot said. James grinned, “He’s working in the Prophet, Wormtail is.” “Really? Which part?” asked Marlene. “The printers,” Peter said. Lily thought he had a rather hangdog expression. “That’s some complicated charm work,” Dermot said, “One of the lads in Nimbus used to work there.” James looked impressed. “Wow, Peter, that’s really …” But whatever he was going to say was cut off by several piercing screams outside. They stared at each other for a moment in horror and then all stood and, as one, darted for the door. The scene that greeted them was horrific. Several figures in dark robes aimed curses at fleeing students, one building had been demolished, but, worst of all, there was a giant, swinging two massive clubs at anything that moved. Lily paled, staring at a large knot of students clustered in front of Honeydukes. They were trapped by the giant ahead of them and had no way of getting back to Hogwarts. Thinking quickly, she turned to Marlene, saying, “Go back inside. You have to Floo Dumbledore, or the Ministry, or … get in contact with someone.” Marlene nodded, squeezing Lily’s hand and saying, “Be careful,” as she pulled Dermot back into the pub. One problem solved, Lily turned back to the boys, only to find, to her horror, that Sirius and James had run off to do battle with the giant. She stared at this insanity, nearly driven to unreasoning panic for a moment, before grabbing Peter, who seemed in two minds about following them. “Peter,” she said, “you need to help get that lot back.” His lips were trembling, and his face was pale, but he nodded and said, “What do you want me to do?” She smiled at him encouragingly, but had to pull him down suddenly to dodge a Stunning spell that came dangerously close to hitting them. “Listen,” she said, “see all of them running back to the school? They’re panicking; they’re tripping over each other. You can Apparate right?” “Yeah, but not …” “Great. Get over there, calm them down and get them moving. Keep seventh-years at the back, especially people who are good at Defence.” He looked terrified. “Lily,” he said, “I can’t.” As she watched the barman of the Hog’s Head duck three curses at once, Lily knew she had no time for this. “You can,” she said earnestly, “now … Remus!” Thankfully, Remus joined them as soon as she called, and Lily left the task of reassuring Peter to him, taking her wand in hand. “What are you doing?” Peter asked. “I’m stopping them from getting themselves killed,” she said, pointing at James and Sirius, “and then I’m getting everyone else out of here.” As she turned to go, Remus grabbed her upper arm with surprising strength, whispering urgently, “Lily, there’s a tunnel in the Honeydukes basement that’ll bring you back to the school. They both know where to find it.” Lily grinned at this unexpected good news and kissed him quickly on the cheek. “Now both of you, go!” she cried. Quickly, she turned and started to make her way through the melee, Stunning one Death Eater and body-binding another. She used a Banishing hex on a third, who flew across the street, slammed into a wall and slid to the ground, unconscious. She was shocked when his mask slipped off to reveal the chiselled, coldly handsome features of Lucius Malfoy, the Head Boy from her very first year. Shaking her head at this discovery, Lily ran the final few feet to where James and Sirius were throwing ineffectual spells at the giant. Fear and fury combining to freeze her veins, she yanked at James’ arm. “What are you doing!” she screamed. He looked as angry as she was when he turned around, but all three of them had to duck when a large explosion rocked just behind them. Once it was safe for them to stand up, Lily saw something that almost made her heart stop beating as she felt herself sway from shock; a figure with golden-brown hair slumped in the door of the apothecary. “Dorcas!” she screamed, recognising the scarf, but her friend did not move. James and Sirius had turned to see where she was, Sirius’ head moving so fast Lily feared for a moment he would suffer from whiplash. He gave Lily a brief nod and turned to battle his way over to the apothecary. Lily breathed a sigh of relief – whatever else he was, Sirius was a brilliant wizard, and she knew there was no way on earth he would let any more harm come to Dorcas – and pulled on James’ hand, saying, “We have to go – now.” His face was incredulous as he said, “Someone has to fight these people!” “You’re Head Boy – you’ve got to help me get the others back to Hogwarts.” “They won’t be able to get back if I don’t hold this giant off.” “I won’t let you kill yourself, James!” she shouted, feeling tears prick her eyes. His mouth fell open, and he actually took a step back from her in shock, but Lily took advantage of this momentary lapse, and, grabbing his hand, Apparated them both directly in front of the group of students outside Honeydukes. James pulled away from her furiously, but his expression changed when he saw the younger students staring at them gratefully. “All right,” he said through gritted teeth, “what’s the plan?” “We bring them out through the tunnel.” “Okay. Good idea.” He raised his voice, and started directing the students, his tone the epitome of mature authority, though Lily could tell he had to strain to maintain it. As he commanded them, Lily scanned the area around them. Thankfully, they were rather far from the centre of the fighting, all participants doing their best to avoid the giant, who was busy demolishing a row of cottages, but it never hurt to be careful. Lily guessed there were nearly a hundred students with them, plus at least twice as many on the road between Hogwarts and the village. She prayed that the rest were all right, though there was no knowing how many had snuck off into the woods for a moment of privacy. She had rather planned on asking James to do just that later. As the last of them filed in, he turned to her and said, “Wait a few minutes for stragglers?” “Yeah. I’ll send up red sparks.” They leaned against the doorjamb, wands in hand, and James glanced at her nervously before saying, “How’d you know about the tunnel?” She shrugged. “Remus told me.” “Oh.” “What?” “It’s just … he was supposed to keep it a secret – not that he was wrong to …” “It was only just now.” “Okay.” Lily sighed – obviously her outburst had upset him. They stood in almost complete silence for the next ten minutes, during which Gretta Catchlove arrived, half carrying her younger sister, as well as protecting two other girls, followed by Buckely Cooper, and last of all Gaspard Shingleton ushering a large group of fourth-years, and gazing fearfully behind him. “Lily,” he gasped, “I don’t know where Dorcas is – we got separated.” James gestured at him sharply. “Sirius is getting her. Now get that lot inside.” By this stage the battle had come worryingly close, though Aurors had arrived and actually seemed to be winning. Lily glanced at James – he nodded, and they were about to get going when Sirius Apparated in front of them, clutching a still unconscious Dorcas. He slumped to one side almost immediately, groaning out the words, “I tripped. Did something to my knee.” James propped him up, while Lily bent to check Dorcas’ pulse. “That’s all?” he said. Sirius nodded. “Yeah. It’s fine.” Satisfied her friend was all right, Lily said, “We really need to go.” James nodded and bent to pick Dorcas up, carrying her over his shoulder. Lily couldn’t help raising an eyebrow. “Do you carry everyone that way?” she said. “Very funny.” He went through the door, and Lily gestured to Sirius. He shook his head. “It’s fine, Lily, really.” “Don’t be an idiot,” she admonished him. “You can barely stand.” Briefly, he seemed to consider arguing, but gave in quickly, slinging one arm over her shoulders. She staggered momentarily under the weight – he was a good bit taller than her, and quite broad with it, unlike James, or even Remus – but she gritted her teeth and got moving. * * * Hours later they sat in the hospital wing. It turned out that Dorcas had caught the tail end of one of the giant’s more powerful swings, which had sent her careening into the apothecary door. Madam Pomfrey said that the impact had actually been fairly gentle, for a giant, but even so, between the club and the oaken door of the apothecary, she had sustained four broken ribs, a fractured collarbone and a concussion. The nurse said it was a miracle she hadn’t punctured a lung the way James had carried her and insisted on her staying the night for observation. Dorcas had chafed at the restriction, but Sirius had quelled her with a single look. Lily eyed the pair of them curiously – she’d never seen that happen before, though, given the pained intensity with which he’d stared at her bed while Madam Pomfrey worked, she probably shouldn’t have been surprised. Dorcas had exasperatedly confessed that Gaspard had attempted to kiss her once again, with the telling comment of, “Honestly, Lily, I’m not that good-looking.” She was asleep now, as it was quite late, but they still sat around her bed. None of them had eaten, though Peter had offered to go to the kitchens, and Marlene had already left for mysterious, though apparently urgent, reasons. They’d been sitting in silence for several minutes when Professor Dumbledore joined them. He sat down stiffly and Lily saw how tired he looked. “I am very proud of you. All of you,” he said, the sincerity plain in his voice. “You responded to the crisis better than I could have imagined. I did not think Lord Voldemort …” – a shudder ran around the room – “would attack Hogsmeade again so soon, and his objective, I must confess, at this point eludes me. Nonetheless, you have achieved much, so much so that … well, I shall discuss this with you later.” Lily glanced at James – the Headmaster was not usually so frank. James appeared to share her confusion, for he said, “Sir, what will we discuss later?” Dumbledore smiled. “All in good time, Mr Potter. Suffice to say, I would not ask it of you at present. Now, may I suggest you all get some sleep, as Miss Meadows has so wisely chosen to do – you have had a most trying day.” They took this as their cue to leave, and saying goodnight to the Headmaster, left the hospital wing. The others sped off to the kitchens, but James hung back, pulling Lily into an alcove. He took several deep breaths, and touched her face for reassurance, before he seemed able to say, “About earlier …” There was a look of desperate striving on his face as he searched for words, and, taking pity on him, Lily said, “When I said …” “Yeah, that. It’s just, do you really think …?” Lily put a hand to his face, stroking his cheekbone with her thumb. She kept her tone as gentle as possible as she said, “I shouldn’t have yelled it at you like that, but, yeah, I do a little. You’ve been scaring me a bit to be honest.” James looked horrified and said quickly, “I would never …” “I know James, it’s just … I … I really like you, you know, and I don’t want anyone killing you except me.” She tried to speak lightly, tried to hide the true meaning of her words, but she’d never felt so vulnerable, and when she looked in his eyes, she could tell he knew it. So, rather than face the words he might, or might not say, she kissed him, feeling such a tangle of fear and desire and exhaustion and … love that she thought she might faint. Lily hung on to his body, his shoulders an anchor for her as her head swirled, and she had struggled against confusion and dizziness. But perhaps he felt the same, for he clung just as fervently, pulling her ever closer … They were interrupted by Professor McGonagall’s indignant shout, “Miss Evans! Mr Potter!” They turned to her, shame-faced, prepared for a lecture. “Honestly, I appreciate that you have had a stressful day, but that is no excuse. I may have caught Mr Potter before, but I thought you at least, Miss Evans, had learned to be more discreet, though I understand Mr Potter is irretrievably exuberant.” She glared at them, with a stare that could melt iron, and James said, “Sorry, Professor. Won’t happen again.” But though his voice sounded sincere, James still held her hand, and there was a distinct twinkle in his eye. Professor McGonagall was witheringly sceptical. “Really, Mr Potter? I should be extremely surprised if that is the case. Now get back to your common room.” Blushing, they did as they were told.
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